All Comments on 'The Target Ch. 01'

Awesome....i am really intrigued, esp. given Jackie's last line. And why did Jackie let him come in? is the foot really not broken?

The one thing that didn't flow well was Roman says something about the side of town and the people etc. And then parks an Audi between a Mazda and pick-up and thinks he is inconspicuous...doesn't really work for me.

Aside from that, well-done. I want to knwo more about these characters and look forward to the next chapter.

I'm having a hard time liking Roman, but his reaction to Jackie takes a little of the bastard-ness out of him. I wonder if Jackie's really injured or if he's faking it for some reason. And why the hell does the guy want Jackie dead? You've done a great job reeling me in. Keep going!

Curious how things will go

So good . You have me hooked . More please . : )

Nice start. I can't wait for the next installment.

I can't really picture Roman yet, there's too little to get to know him a bit, or sympathize with him even though he's a paid killer. You might want to give him "a face" in the next part :) I really like this beginning though, keep it up :)

I'm loving the first chapter! such a good cliffhanger, i will defiantly be following this series....hopefully you will post soon (: It would be great if the next chapter was a bit longer though! Please don't leave us waiting!

I am really looking forward to the next installment. Thanks for sharing.

OMG! This is awesome. I am looking forward to the next chapter...coming soon, I hope.

Love it. I' m a huge fan of asassins and spies. So this is right up my alley. Good cliffie too! Keep it up!

Xoxo NT

Well straight forward isnt he. I had a feeling one of them was going to ask something like that. I like it so far update soon please.

Darn! That cliffhanger was too good!

The last line of the story just nailed it.

Amazing start. I can't wait for more.

The last line threw a curveball in the mix I'm intrigued now can't wait for ch2

Loved it..

I love the set-up, and the last line makes for a great hook. Looking forward to more!

I can't wait for the next chapter

You really know how to hook someone in! Can't wait for the next chapter. Hope it comes quickly

...to charm a professional hit man out of killing him. And convincing said hit man to give him a ride home. Definitely intriguing and I will be following this story, even though this pace is a bit fast for my personal taste.

The last line totally caught me off guard :')

NOOOOOOOO WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS!?!?!?!?!?!? NEXT CHAPTER MUST COME NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lolz..luckily I came along when there is a second chapter to be read....onwards and upwards...pleazze dont stop writing..I beg..enjoying it too much already

Onto the next chapter... but how could you have stopped there lol

Very good start. Diappointing, another unfinished story. Make sure there are more than 4 chapters before reading. Author hasn't updated in almost two years.