- All
Comments (5) - Add a
Comment
| Literotica Toy Store ADULT TOY & DVD STORE FAST & DISCREET |
Literotica XXX Webcams 24/7 LIVE CAMS - FREE PREVIEW W/AUDIO! |
Literotica Adult Movies STREAMING ADULT MOVIES PAY PER MINUTE |
| Literotica Toy Store ADULT TOY & DVD STORE FAST & DISCREET |
Literotica XXX Webcams 24/7 LIVE CAMS - FREE PREVIEW W/AUDIO! |
Literotica Adult Movies STREAMING ADULT MOVIES PAY PER MINUTE |
| Literotica Toy Store ADULT TOY & DVD STORE FAST & DISCREET |
Literotica XXX Webcams 24/7 LIVE CAMS - FREE PREVIEW W/AUDIO! |
Literotica Adult Movies STREAMING ADULT MOVIES PAY PER MINUTE |
A TAR ON LIBERTY
and celebrating nothing. TK U MLJ LV NV
I can see it all
I remember this one about Japan. Loved the scene then and still do today.
I am
one lucky woman today. Dammit, Neo, I wish I had your talent, your imagination, and some of your reality. You know I adore you, dontcha? and your poetry makes you even sexier. wish you would let me vote, it is a 5+
~ m
seems to me, neo
that this is a poem all by itself:
I want dirty sex on clean sheets,
get nasty with Natsu and her
plum sweet sister, Setsu.
They teach me kinky can be endless
with twins in lotus position,
disappearing into ivory skin,
a double happiness, bliss out.
maybe a different poem, but 'the' poem. it is complete unto itself :)
This is good, Neo, but I agree
with Chip that it would benefit from being pared down. I'm not sure I would single out just that one stanza (I'd probably include the following one, or at least part of it and part of the previous one), but this seems to me to be a little over-wordy as is.
If it was me (which, obviously it isn't) I'd maybe start at "Drinking too much makes me dumb" (which it always does).
Very good poem, anyway, even if you do nothing with it. All of my comment is opinion, in any case. As I'm sure you certainly know.
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to Flashback to Roppongi or
More submissions by Neonurotic.