Anger

Pathetic

Just a pile of meaningless words that about to a pile of cowshit

How do these asshole authors look themselves in the mirror?

Just like "asshole the elder." No sane person would call this garbage "quality erotica." Writes to satisfy the dark desires of those who populate the rear row of dirty adult theatres.

Horrible

Just horrible

This was different.

The problem with the story is that the reader finds both characters totally disgusting. Their attitudes are upsetting at best. It does create emotion and is well written, but leaves the reader dissatisfied and unsettled, like unknowingly taking a swig of milk that has soured.

They Obviously Deserve Each Other

But why the fuck do you think we want to read about it?

Who Cares?

There are no redeeming qualities in either of them Who cares? They are both disgusting

No one to like in this story

If I had read this without knowing the author's moniker, I would have assumed it was JPB writing this one. Sad that they apparently have kids. I shudder to think how they will turn out with two dimwit parents like these. But in spite of my distaste for the plot, I base my score (two stars) on the lack of eroticism, the lack of character development, and the writing quality, rather than the improbability of the scenario.

I gave it a one

not only because the story was bad but because both characters were irredeemable and while they are both losers, the ones who lose the most are the two children.

And she fucking anoher guy at the party and no one knows about it? IF I were the host and two people (I don't even care if they are married to each other) are fucking, they get booted the fuck out!

Then you have the wife deliberately fucking another man 5 times? All while demanding her husband come get her....and no one else notices? How the fuck old are you? 12?

No story here

Same ol some ol nothing new boring

How true

Some wife he is married to. Deny, deny and more denial. Maybe she will get lucky and have her lovers kid and Jerry will think it is his. The wife is haviing her cake and eating it too. Nice story and enjoyed the real story which was told by the wife. Thanks for writing this gem.

How odd

Sometimes I think they ought to rename LV, moralizers united. If they don't like the stories, then don't read them! Not at all bad Murphy. Keep it up.

ahhhh, how sweet

Gotta love a tender love story!

Both need to get away from the other. Hers a final dealbreaker, and John for her, if he wants her and wants to support her too...or someone else

Gay

Britease is a bigger Motherfucker than Murphy. Murphy should pay back by fucking his asshole. I need a 5 (vote) for my short story. Thanks in advance for all pospective voters.

Both

Interesting...but not very enjoyable. So both are cheaters now, both profess to love each other but want there secret lives as well. Just not a very satisfying story, how can the marriage survive, and should it.

Well written, but I am torn between wondering why they stay together and wondering if either would change if they found a new partner. Two married people who obviously don't communicate well, who have two children and occasional good sex as the foundation for a marriage. The children are a good reason to stay together, but lots of times in these marriages, the kids are unhappy at all the bickering and infighting that goes on. I doubt that the relationship is going to get any better when this particular session of "mind blowing sex" wears off, which should be in about 24 hours. Then the realization that a lot of people know his wife is a slut will set in for sure. Oh yes, there is the matter of his affair, a secret no longer and that should really add to the marital bliss. All things considered, probably should decline the next party invitation from these friends, assuming there is another one.

Murph, when will you understand that you MUST have at least

ONE likeable character?

Fucking Shit

I HATE CHEATIN SPOUSES.
I hate Linda more because she was a devious bitch.
She wants Jerry to give up his slut but she wants to keep her stud. She's a real fucking cunt.
Jerry's an asshole also.
FUCK

Bait...

Why do I get the feeling this story was written for the sole purpose of being troll bait?

I can't shake the conclusion that the sole purpose of this is so the author can troll for comments, I certainly see no other possible reason for writing this...

Two crappy characters

Possibly a quite real story. I'm sure there are a lot of wives who find out their husbands are fucking around and decide they like the marriage situation and will just get some of their own on the side. Meanwhile the tension between them mounts as respect, the glue of marriage, falls away.

However, the reality is that stories in the sewer like this stink. No character in the story is remotely sympathetic. At first we think hubby is being wronged and then we find he is being an asshole as well. The author misleads and betrays the reader just like these two are cheating on each other. It's an effective emotional trigger but the story still sucks. Some authors just like to fuck with the readers.

betrayed

a fat cock is smoked, a cornhole rudely buggered, betrayed!

two wrongs do not make a right

he is a slut and she needs the other guys 10 inches, average is 6. that makes him a freak of nature and most women he is too big. also this is a sluty story. it has become an open marriage with both parties trying to keep it going and secret. no way this ends well.

NEITHER CHEATER

was too secretive. TK U MLJ LV NV

arguably the stupidest story of all time

its incoherent ..its moronic ... it is vile... it is not erotic. In short it is everything that this waste of talent author is know for.

Yawn

stupid people in a stupid story

kinda makes me wonder about the author

Thanks

For sharing.

Yikes

What a really fucked up story, nothing but losers, sluts and pimps, no thanks.

Two ugly

selfish people who do not communicate. Ugly story...

I agree, stupid ugly people, two in the story

and murphy621 the pathetic fucking loser who posting this pure garbage.

dear sick writer

your manipuation of your puppet characters to try to shock readers with blatant crass non-erotic non-realistic sordid crap can be done by anybody with a keyboard and a small amount of talent.

You entertain yourself and a few sicko's as jaded as you are but the vast majority of readers that don't avoid you can see your purpose and needs.

You wish admiration but can't get an "H" in 83 tries. Go find a mirror and applaud yourself.

Puke

Boring as watching paint dry. Obviously just another piece of garbage from the cuck/slut genre.

Good thing

is that their staying together saves two other people!

I think they make a good couple

I wonder which one of them will finally give up and leave. They certainly don't need each other to satisfy their sexual urges.

Since she's nothing more than a common whore, he should pimp her ass out and make some money from her fucking other guys...

Figure out your target audience

There are two sides to LW: the Spankers and the Sadists (to stay in allitertive style)

The first are looking for bald eroticism, frequently with the hot taboo sex/humiliation of the husband that twigs their particular kink. A wife so hot she is untamable...except for a nice big juicy (black) cock. (For the non-erotic variety, try Matt Moreau) This is not a disparagement, but an analysis.

The story failed them because the husband wasn't humiliated and there wasn't anywhere near enough eroticism to engage their libidinousness.

Then there are the Sadists, who long for a nice morality tale of a wife doing bad and how first the husband suffers, but then makes the wife suffer more. A nice juicy revenge plot. I'm as guilty as the next guy for liking them (if done well)

The problem here is there is no suffering, no morality, no revenge, no one being sincerely sorry.

The characters don't need to be perfect, but they are both not learning anything from their actions. In fact the wife is going very far backwards.

Hence the score. Jasonh said it about as well as I could.

Thank you for the courage of writing. It's hard and you can only reliably please yourself.

What is this story meat? Husbands do not give yourr mistress for sake of your wives!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am sorry!!! What is this story meat? Husbands do not give your mistress for sake of your wives UP !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Two cheating assholes that should NEVER have kids. In fact they should NEVER have got married. He is a wimp and she is a bitch whore, but then I guess some men like their wives being whores I have no idea why. And some woman like their men to not be 'men' I have no idea why.

Idiotic

Give them both a Darwin Award as they should never breed. The story was absolutely stupid, and, no I did not finish it. I stopped with "She then proceeded to give me a world class blow job after which I took her to bed where the make up sex was mind blowing. If she kept this up I might have to give up Mary Jo."
WHAT? Why do writers think that an angry man will throw out all reason for a lousy blowjob? Especially when he had pussy on the side?? One out of five.

What was the point?

This story has no target. It's not erotic. It's not a cheating story with any point. It's just a stupid story about two worthless people who are prime examples to legalize forced sterilization.
I always support writers and encourage them to write to their inspiration. But, what exactly was the inspiration for this story?
Any way keep writing. No one is ever successful if they don't try.

NIce Change

I thought it was excellent! nice about face, cheating husband cuckled by wife. Slut husbands should get the short end of the stick. Plus the writing was good!

Chilley

Two AIDS cases waiting to happen

both are pure trash, the world would be a better place without them

don't hit the guy to much

sure he went nowhere with this but doesn't mean some good writer can take it for a start
Anger is a strong feeling on which to build on

A cunt is a cunt

She is -

Nicely done he of course is a sap - too bad

Fuck the Whore

Just tell the whore to go to hell and diviorce her as fast as you can.

Second Comment

Which is the worst offender.
The wife, of course.
She knew what she was doing the whole time and put on an academy award performance for her husband. Yes he is a cheating asshole himself but he isn't as devious as the wife. Get a divorce then kill each other. You both deserve to die in pain.

FUCK

jasonh and FD45 summarize the story best; a faliure.

This story isn't about anger, it's about dishonesty.

Rubbish

After reading this story this is another author who I have no need to bother reading, it is just pure shit!

Pity

They have become roommates (with benefits)! The pity is that they will continue to posture as if he is her Hubby and she is his Sweetie. That will lead to rancor and discord, and that would be unnecessary if they would simply agree that they are just living in the same house (with some affection!)
The story could have been told with better effect (Hubby losing track of Sweetie for a long period of time); how Sweetie got nailed in a fairly public way; then the ease of the BJ reconciliation!
4*

trash is trash, divorce or AIDS is the options

she is worse than he is. she went to the party to commit adultry, best they take pistols and each commit suicide so as not to pollute the gene pool.

sucked!

I can´t believe you left the story where it is. Absolutely not satisfying. 1000 ways to burn that bitch and you just quit.