All Comments  for

The End of Fear

byHawksheart©
All
Comments (6)
by Anonymous

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by prosserelizabeth03/28/12

Really!

Okay I loved the story, but unless your the author J.R. Ward that was so wrong.

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Hawksheart03/29/12

Forgot the disclaimer

I apologize to anyone who's already read this story & noticed that I didn't have a disclaimer. I had one ready but apparently forgot to include it. I've now resubmitted the story with the appropriate disclaimer & again apologize for the omission.

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Anonymous03/29/12

brilliant

I am a fan of the originol stories
and yours is written very very well.. write more please

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Anonymous03/31/12

Great Story!

I just had one problem ~

When Rio meets the guys and Xhex, she has to tell the tale of killing two men who had attacked her and a young girl named Jenna. She is very detailed in her telling of what she did and how they animals died. When her "boys" are relating the story later, they even repeat her words that the families still take flowers to the dead men's graves.

Now we travel forward to Jace answering Rio's question about why he left her, and him saying after two weeks of staying away, he went back and killed the two men who attacked her, and, again, he was very detailed in his description of how they suffered and died.

Unless the animal were "undead" too, I don't see how it was possible for Jace to kill two men that Rio had already killed. :/

I hope the author IS J. R. Ward, or at the very least has some sort of disclaimer explaining what's doing! I really did enjoy the concept and the story!

~SizzlinSis~

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Hawksheart04/03/12

Apology for Continuity Error

Boy, I must have been asleep when I published this one. I recently edited this due to a serious continuity error between Chapter 3 & Chapter 17. This error was kindly pointed out to me by an anonymous reader. Thank you, I really appreciated that. I have no idea how I missed it & I apologize to any readers who have been confused by this error. It's fixed now & I hope the administrators are able to get it reposted before too many more readers are pulling their hair out over this :)

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by erinjamison09/04/12

I thought it was grrreaaattt!!

A little too Tony the Tiger? I loved it actually. This story was obviously written before book 8 came out with John and Xhex being together. This is a fabulous thing for you to write and be read in between the next published BDB books especially because in this story we see more of the what?...brothers!!! More and more in the new books that come out there are sooo many story lines to keep straight and new characters introduced all the time that I so miss the actual brothers we all fell in love with.

I for one, can't wait until I read the next one from you. I will say that initially you were very clear in indicating then end of one chapter to another but there are more than a couple spaces here where you reading about a glorious orgasm and the next sentence is an brewing standoff between Wrath and Rio in his office so if it isn't indeed meant to be another chapter, I would say better transitions are needed. Other than that. Great job. Don't forget the shitkickers next time. I always love to hear unique JR vernacular.

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.

Click here to leave your own comment on this submission!  or
Back to The End of Fear  or
More submissions by Hawksheart.

Add a
Comment

Post a public comment on this submission (click here to send private anonymous feedback to the author instead).

Post comment as (click to select):

You may also listen to a recording of the characters.

Preview comment

Forgot your password?

Please wait

Change picture

Your current user avatar, all sizes:

Default size User Picture  Medium size User Picture  Small size User Picture  Tiny size User Picture

You have a new user avatar waiting for moderation.

Select new user avatar:

   Cancel