All Comments on 'Last Mission'

looking forward to the next chapter

cant wait for rest of story!!!!!!!!!

"transforming girls from virgins to whores?"

If Susan is the highly skilled assassin she's made out to be, utilizing the sexual tactics she displayed in seducing and killing Rocky, yet turns out to be a virgin or similarly lacking in experience, that doesn't make a lot of sense.

There's great potential for some very dark humor in having this skilled whoremaker trying to "break" someone who is technically already broken. An assassin, after all, is someone who is already depersonalized, using whatever persona is necessary to get the job done, ditching all sense of normalcy. Assassins aren't just "tough guys". I'm hoping you play to that strength, rather than turning this into a standard non-con in the coming chapters.

Like I said, you've got a great premise here, and the story so far is well-told. Keep it up.

Can't wait for more! To the commenter below: "Transforming a virgin into a whore." They intended to treat her AS IF she were one of the kidnapped women who were being transformed from virgin to whore. Not transform HER from virgin to whore. See the difference?

This story is my first anywhere on the internet. So it is very encouraging to see so many of you enjoying the story. I am still developing the plot for the heroine. What would you readers like to see happen to her? How long should she resist before breaking? What about the villains? Which one should be more fully developed? Where should the story arc go for Paul? Any suggestions (positive or negative) will be fully appreciated.

Thanks for sharing.

Writer needs to practice more. "using his left index finger to (open the cover)", "selected grade 87." Completely irrelevant to the story which shows lack of experience. It appears the writer is fluffing the story to get a minimum number of words like a school project. It does not matter, nor does anyone care which finger he used to open the cover. Nor does anyone care what kind of gas he filled the car with. If it has no significance to the story, don't include it.