I really liked the story but at times it is was hard to follow. Keep writing but maybe try an editor.
by
Anonymous05/23/12
please ....
get someone to help with the editing. i can see writing stuff down so you dont forget. but the errors and the marathon speed of the story is a bit much. i hope it improves.
Ok its getting better but it can be great with a little more work put into it!! It needs more of a back story on john so we can understand why he is the way he is!! I hope he not so head strong or overly possive over her which i kno is not got to happen with a vampire male being overly protective over there mates but i hope she getts over her fears and is more confident n herself and shows more emotion and a back story on why she acts the way she does. mainly i want to read growth in the charcters in the next chapters to come
English
Editor editor editor
The title says it all!
i loved it!
Dying for more!
Good but...
I really liked the story but at times it is was hard to follow. Keep writing but maybe try an editor.
please ....
get someone to help with the editing. i can see writing stuff down so you dont forget. but the errors and the marathon speed of the story is a bit much. i hope it improves.
well done keep it coming!!
Ok its getting better but it can be great with a little more work put into it!! It needs more of a back story on john so we can understand why he is the way he is!! I hope he not so head strong or overly possive over her which i kno is not got to happen with a vampire male being overly protective over there mates but i hope she getts over her fears and is more confident n herself and shows more emotion and a back story on why she acts the way she does. mainly i want to read growth in the charcters in the next chapters to come
Good start off
If u need an editor email me at dancinginlet@yahoo.com
Good
I like this, cant wait to read more. But maybe you should get an editor. I'll keep reading anyway ;-)
Good Read...
I enjoyed this story so far, ready for more please.
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