You get inside your characters' heads pretty well and the sex was written pacily enough too keep my interest. Little things let this slide. For example, you went from the initial cock sucking scene to Dallas licking Autumn out without him getting her undressed. I had to stop and backtrack there for a moment so it lost some impetus.
Also, I'm not prudish about underage stuff if it's consensual but you didn't need to keep hammering home that he'd fancied her since she was thirteen That's just a bit cheap really.
But otherwise yeah, not a bad story.
English
Got off to a good start
You get inside your characters' heads pretty well and the sex was written pacily enough too keep my interest. Little things let this slide. For example, you went from the initial cock sucking scene to Dallas licking Autumn out without him getting her undressed. I had to stop and backtrack there for a moment so it lost some impetus.
Also, I'm not prudish about underage stuff if it's consensual but you didn't need to keep hammering home that he'd fancied her since she was thirteen That's just a bit cheap really.
But otherwise yeah, not a bad story.
Awesome
Love all your stories they are always HOT HOT Keep up the great work !!!
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