Genie Chronicles - Make a Wish 00

Hmm...

I hope you can do the original justice with this. It'll be nice if you could see this all the way through to it's natural conclusion unlike Joe, who hasn't posted a new chapter in over 5 years.

Anyways, a decent start, just a few missing words and other proofreading errors, but not enough to detract from the story significantly. Nothing an editor can't readily fix.

I'll be keeping an eye on this story, watching to see how it goes, so you'll probably see more comments from me in the future. Have fun writing!

Joe truely created a great formula with his genie store, and it has been used many times to great times. Looking forward to how you use it, it's looking like a great start so far.

Like it

I love the idea. I'm excited to see some of the action you've got in store.

Very nicely done.

An excellent set up with good characterization.
Genies and wishes are always a good base for an erotic story, I look forward to seeing how you make it your own. And don't worry about your story being compared to anyone else's. What you make it, it will be, and I get the feeling that it will be great.

good start, don't let it hang

Good start of a story, please add a chapter

i cant believe i read this

there may be some crap on literoticia but this pushes it. ive read only a few worse stories. 'a sexy libraian, which she found sexy' oh my god.

Ignore the pissy reader

Yes, you could use an editor to polish it a little. And yes, there are cliches - there are going to be in any story that involves a genie. An interesting start.