Pultoy I like your stories. Where is this one. There is a beginning and an ending but no middle. Where is the tension, the anger, the recriminations. I felt nothing in this one. This is an outline. Please rewrite it. Give it some life. I gave this ***.
Over the top Cruel Revenge Story, fortunately the revenge does not couse harm for inocent. I am revenge story fan, but this STD form revenge weapon is too cruel for me.
The Modern Figaro TYPE and the Romantic Revenge stories are nearer to my taste and I prefer the less harmful Cruel Revenge Stories.However we knew a newer STD types the human papiloma viruses, thank you for the newer knowledge about STDs............
No one seems to be putting much thought in their stories anymore. What happened to the days when stories had a plot. As far as I'm concerned, it's been a disappointing month for LW.
As usual, I gave you 3* out of respect for the author.
Inflicting someone with a permanently debilitating disease because you were too stupid to recognize she was a tramp in the first place? That's pretty low. Syphilis or the crabs, OK. Annoying but curable. The story is a slight variation on setting up a guy to sleep with a prostitute you know has VD.
So you infect both of them, what about their future sex partners????? Since they won't stay together, they will spread the STD all over town. RIGHT???? Not such a sweet revenge after all. I also agree with other comments - NOT MUCH EROTICA IN HER. 2*'s. You thought, that you were very imaginative with HPV infection, but instead came up with a very angry and not clever story. Sorry, but I think you should think it through first.
it's very creative, hpv now that's a new twist. Don't worry about the haters. It was short, to the point and it was all about revenge. Now maybe she can become a "LW" for Lance, warts and all.
OK, author has Sweety at a club/dance hall. She insults Hubby with fainter praise than she heaps on the Bull. Presumption is that he leaves her there, or she opts to further insult Hubby by leaving with the Bull for some naughtiness. However, that is never stated (might have been erotic, doncha know!) We later find that Sweety was, by that time, already 'hot' in a fashion unknown and unsuspected by Sweety OR the Bull. A while after the bar scene, we find out that the disease DID take on Sweety, whose life is now severely compromised until she dies, no matter how much she changes her attitudes and behaviors! We can only ASSume she did manage to infect Bull. Hubby is unlikely to ask to see Lance's privates.
MORAL: Make NO enemies in HS!!!
Huedogg, was your last comment, '...LW, Lance, Warts and all' a deliberate pun? Enjoyed it, either way!
3* partly on PullToy's other fine (or finer' heh heh') offerings!
Harry in Va wants more, a second chapter.
Thinkingman wants a middle chapter.
Duna, well he doesn't know what he wants, exactly other than he wants to be seen saying something.
Sydney thinks it is fine, likes it (Bless you my child).
Wanderingaimlessly takes a snapshot as he/she flies by.
Bruce agrees.with all the others.
Tazz wonders who has the sandwiches.
Nakedsub wonders where the good authors have gone, but gives this a 3 because I'm a good author.
sgt feels guilty about reading the story at work.
Chy is courteous and thanks me.
cantbuymy wants in my will, giving me 5 stars.(You're in, boy)
Jasonh thinks it is too vicious.
Dmitry can't believe I'd give the bad boy and girl a vd for life, Oh, the humanity, the humanity!
digdaddyrich thinks it is too short.
Huedog want's part of cantbuymy's place in my will.(You can have the house in Malibu)
Likedeesplit....could I have some of what you're having?
7 anonymous all get deleted as cowards. Unnamed soldiers, they are, though not really soldiers, just shooter-uppers.
A gracious thank you to all you readers and commenters who have the courage of your conictions, sufficient to at least identify yourself with the world in some way.
Was just to funny .And yes it was just a story . To bad so many people take them so seriously . Thanks . If i had something like you gave to my now ex and her lover now husband . I would of in a second . You can take that one to the bank ....
that just maybe you had an idea for a story, then sorta mailed it in.
Based on your other stories, I wonder if you yourself felt that this was a rather vicious and completely unjustifiable 'revenge,' and maybe didn't have the stomach to really work on it.
I agree with JasonH.
I'm getting more and more displeased with revenge stories, generally. Seems like you are pushing the bounds in recent tales to take revenge to extremes. In this one, the hero marries an immature tramp. Rather than divorce the worthless waste of space (only 2 years+no kids=quicky divorce and moving on), he sets her up to cheat on him and infects her with an incurable disease. Disgusting.
If your intent was to weed out those commentors who have basic human decency and maturity from those who don't, then this little flash-almost-story is an interesting and perhaps successful exercise.
Otherwise, it was incomplete and distasteful.
Oh shit! My comment was almost as long as your posting.
Anyone else feel like our chains are being pulled like so many of the author's other pull-toys?
Whatever, I'll keep reading your stuff....
Hubby was right early on ... about letting Lance have the bitch before high school was over. Divorce during their salad days would have been (as became clear after the heinous crime) fairly painless. Lance may have deserved a good (but fair) fight, but nobody deserves a lifetime sentence of disfiguring, painful and infectuous disease as revenge for the offenses against Hubby described here! Maybe crab lice!
guy. How could he be such a giving person? I mean he should have given them something like some kind of flesh eating disease or something like that. Oh well, you are too nice.
English
is there like a 2nd paragraph to this?
just wondering ..
A little sparse
Pultoy I like your stories. Where is this one. There is a beginning and an ending but no middle. Where is the tension, the anger, the recriminations. I felt nothing in this one. This is an outline. Please rewrite it. Give it some life. I gave this ***.
Over the top Cruel Revenge Story, fortunately the revenge does not couse harm for inocent. I am revenge story fan, but this STD form revenge weapon is too cruel for me.
The Modern Figaro TYPE and the Romantic Revenge stories are nearer to my taste and I prefer the less harmful Cruel Revenge Stories.However we knew a newer STD types the human papiloma viruses, thank you for the newer knowledge about STDs............
Love it, so no need to make it longer. Nothing more to see here folks, just move along LOL.
LOL
This is a snap shot distilled torched earth flash story. lol
Outline for a story.
The last two commentators hit the nail on the head....
NEVER PISS OFF ANY BODY WHO CONTROLS
modern chemistry. TK U MLJ LV NV
I just don't know anymore...
No one seems to be putting much thought in their stories anymore. What happened to the days when stories had a plot. As far as I'm concerned, it's been a disappointing month for LW.
As usual, I gave you 3* out of respect for the author.
What is the meat of this story?. USE CONDOM!
Entertainment
While some of these stories are incredulous they are also entertaining. Something to pass the time when you should be working.
Good Read
Thanks for sharing.
love a good flash story
u get a 5
Vicious
Inflicting someone with a permanently debilitating disease because you were too stupid to recognize she was a tramp in the first place? That's pretty low. Syphilis or the crabs, OK. Annoying but curable. The story is a slight variation on setting up a guy to sleep with a prostitute you know has VD.
Ok ...
So you infect both of them, what about their future sex partners????? Since they won't stay together, they will spread the STD all over town. RIGHT???? Not such a sweet revenge after all. I also agree with other comments - NOT MUCH EROTICA IN HER. 2*'s. You thought, that you were very imaginative with HPV infection, but instead came up with a very angry and not clever story. Sorry, but I think you should think it through first.
The story was a bit too short
There should have been something of the two cheaters having sex, and how they both discovered their sexual transmitted disease.
Just a bit of tunnel vision on the author's part, focusing only on one part of the story.
I gave it a five
it's very creative, hpv now that's a new twist. Don't worry about the haters. It was short, to the point and it was all about revenge. Now maybe she can become a "LW" for Lance, warts and all.
Missing part
OK, author has Sweety at a club/dance hall. She insults Hubby with fainter praise than she heaps on the Bull. Presumption is that he leaves her there, or she opts to further insult Hubby by leaving with the Bull for some naughtiness. However, that is never stated (might have been erotic, doncha know!) We later find that Sweety was, by that time, already 'hot' in a fashion unknown and unsuspected by Sweety OR the Bull. A while after the bar scene, we find out that the disease DID take on Sweety, whose life is now severely compromised until she dies, no matter how much she changes her attitudes and behaviors! We can only ASSume she did manage to infect Bull. Hubby is unlikely to ask to see Lance's privates.
MORAL: Make NO enemies in HS!!!
Huedogg, was your last comment, '...LW, Lance, Warts and all' a deliberate pun? Enjoyed it, either way!
3* partly on PullToy's other fine (or finer' heh heh') offerings!
Ah, yes; the unwashed masses speak as one:
Harry in Va wants more, a second chapter.
Thinkingman wants a middle chapter.
Duna, well he doesn't know what he wants, exactly other than he wants to be seen saying something.
Sydney thinks it is fine, likes it (Bless you my child).
Wanderingaimlessly takes a snapshot as he/she flies by.
Bruce agrees.with all the others.
Tazz wonders who has the sandwiches.
Nakedsub wonders where the good authors have gone, but gives this a 3 because I'm a good author.
sgt feels guilty about reading the story at work.
Chy is courteous and thanks me.
cantbuymy wants in my will, giving me 5 stars.(You're in, boy)
Jasonh thinks it is too vicious.
Dmitry can't believe I'd give the bad boy and girl a vd for life, Oh, the humanity, the humanity!
digdaddyrich thinks it is too short.
Huedog want's part of cantbuymy's place in my will.(You can have the house in Malibu)
Likedeesplit....could I have some of what you're having?
7 anonymous all get deleted as cowards. Unnamed soldiers, they are, though not really soldiers, just shooter-uppers.
A gracious thank you to all you readers and commenters who have the courage of your conictions, sufficient to at least identify yourself with the world in some way.
It was just a story. Nada mas. Nada menos.
Regards,
-Pultoy
Your counter comment
Was just to funny .And yes it was just a story . To bad so many people take them so seriously . Thanks . If i had something like you gave to my now ex and her lover now husband . I would of in a second . You can take that one to the bank ....
Well
That's one way to get rid of a cheating slut whore wife. Her lover too. With any luck they'll both die from their disease.
HA
Actually, a great outline for a story...
...would have loved to see it fleshed out.
BTTap thinks...
that just maybe you had an idea for a story, then sorta mailed it in.
Based on your other stories, I wonder if you yourself felt that this was a rather vicious and completely unjustifiable 'revenge,' and maybe didn't have the stomach to really work on it.
I agree with JasonH.
I'm getting more and more displeased with revenge stories, generally. Seems like you are pushing the bounds in recent tales to take revenge to extremes. In this one, the hero marries an immature tramp. Rather than divorce the worthless waste of space (only 2 years+no kids=quicky divorce and moving on), he sets her up to cheat on him and infects her with an incurable disease. Disgusting.
If your intent was to weed out those commentors who have basic human decency and maturity from those who don't, then this little flash-almost-story is an interesting and perhaps successful exercise.
Otherwise, it was incomplete and distasteful.
Oh shit! My comment was almost as long as your posting.
Anyone else feel like our chains are being pulled like so many of the author's other pull-toys?
Whatever, I'll keep reading your stuff....
Oh My Gawd!
I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING!!!!
Very well said Mr. Pultoy
A story...
...but too little substance to earn a voting. A pity, actually, because that plot had potential to be played out well.
So, Hubby feels better!
Hubby was right early on ... about letting Lance have the bitch before high school was over. Divorce during their salad days would have been (as became clear after the heinous crime) fairly painless. Lance may have deserved a good (but fair) fight, but nobody deserves a lifetime sentence of disfiguring, painful and infectuous disease as revenge for the offenses against Hubby described here! Maybe crab lice!
HOW FAR IS WAY-TOO FAR
to salve an ego that is self-inflicted-bruised. TK U MLJ LV NV
I can't believe that your hero was such a nice
guy. How could he be such a giving person? I mean he should have given them something like some kind of flesh eating disease or something like that. Oh well, you are too nice.
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