All Comments on 'Why Is She So Fcukin Hot!'
by SueBrasil
- 25 Comments
Anonymousalmost 12 years agoYep, I totally believe this is the way it happened, just like it's written in the story. Here we have a kid that's never had sex before and the first thing he does is to go down on his sister. Oh please ..give me a break. How come in these stories there are never any ugly sisters or brothers, everyone is built like a Greek God or Goddess, the women are all drop dead gorgeous and the guys are all tall handsome and very athletic.
William smythalmost 12 years agoThe answer to your question is that this is a site for erotic fiction or for recalling pleasant experiences.
No ugly or impotent people allowed.
Look elsewhere if you want sad stories.
Anonymousalmost 12 years agoyou say he had an accident but never say what kind or how bad he was hurt. you give no real background as to their relationship before this. this should have been chapter two not one and there better be more because you just left us hanging. what happens when the mom comes back and you never said how old they were. good FIRST DRAFT but not a POSTABLE STORY
Anonymousalmost 12 years ago... spelling wrong?
"I couldn't help but notice her bra strap which lead my eyes towards her "
Why are so many would-be writers unable to tell when to use "lead" and when to use "led"?
When "lead" is pronounced "led" it is talking about the METAL Lead - that which is used for covering roofs, making fishing weights, etc.
thebuffaloalmost 12 years agoThis tale would benefit from a massive rewrite. If poorly written dialogue was against the law it would qualify for 1st degree felony charges.
Anonymousalmost 12 years agoAmazing story, it made me cum twice.
What's with all these lame english teachers trying to talk shit? Its a sex story not a fucking essay contest. If its such a turn off then go elsewhere. No wonder you're fucking single.
LOVED the story..
Anonymousalmost 12 years agoI will not bother reading it.
Anonymousalmost 12 years agoYou said she's 25 and they are 6 years apart which means he's 19. Yet he can't stay home by himself? come on man.
Anonymousalmost 12 years agoin ten minutes. Impressive.
She says she used to want him, when? before she moved out? how old was he?
Anonymousalmost 12 years agoI never had a sister, but if I did I wish she was just like the one in the story.
hornacekalmost 12 years agoTo anonymous who complained about him being 19 and not being able to stay home by himself. If you had paid attention you would have read that he had an accident recently and that his mother didn't want him staying by himself. It didn't give any more information than that, but at least it gave a reason.
Anonymousalmost 12 years agoCould care less what other people think . I read it for me not them .
Anonymousover 11 years agobefore you do any more writing delete this first draft and rewrite it using a GOOD EDITOR. this sounds like either a ten year old wrote it or you were drunk either way it is not good.
Anonymousover 11 years agoyour story has a touch of romance , tenderness, kindness and love and understanding. . Eroticism doesn't need every rough word you can think of. Please continue
Anonymousover 11 years agoi liked the story alot and i think you should continue
Anonymousover 11 years agoI really liked this story. Not to be unkind but I do suggest a little more depth. It was difficukt to follow the movements of the characters getting from one position to another; just not an even flow.
LAROCover 11 years agoBECAUSE I'AM NOT THE BEST SPELLER IN THE WORLD. BUT HONEY YOU NEED A SPELL CHECKER. LOOK AT YOUR TITLE , THEN THE REST OF YOUR STORY. THE STORY HAS A LOT GOING FOR IT. JUST TRY A LITTLE HARDER.AND YOU JUST MIGHT MAKE IT. GOOD LUCK ..........LAROC OF AGES
Anonymousabout 8 years agoAmazing but please continue this story and go a bit more in depth!!!
horny2doitabout 5 years agoYes, such a well written HOT story .... baby brother may be horny But his big sister has the Hots for him and I am sure will teach him how to be a hot, horny and naughty brother !! Teaching him how to bang her hard, well and often through the Summer etc. Now, I hope Jessica as he learns more makes him show her how much he's learned and practice makes perfect !! That his big sister can be so horny too !! Thanks. Cannot wait for more.
ScottishTexanalmost 3 years agoI enjoyed reading this even though it felt very sophomoric. It needs some more maturity in the writing style. The concept is good and I loved the sister pining for her brother for so many years. If you can polish it up, it would be very good. Making it a little bit longer will not be a bad thing either. 3/5
SueBrasil@SueBrasil
