Just let me say a big SO BE IT! to the last commenter.
Chapeters one and two are the set up for chapter 3 in which the long anticipated sexual union spills over. I understand chapter 2 receiving a low rating number. It is nothing happens there except the gradual change in the mother's mindset. Well written...keep it up and please give us the rest soon!
As a mother, I love how the story is slowly developing and exposing "Mom's" needs. I can feel the awakening, the arousal in the discussion and hopefully soon the submission.
This story is coming along so very, VERY well.
The conscious and subconscious all conspiring to overwhelm Moms composure and prejudices.
Well done Susan.
TonyO
The plot of this story is wonderful, I am really loving way the mother is slowly showing signs of coming around to the son's way of thinking.
My only criticism is that you often repeat things a little too often. For example the son refers to his mothers feedback as "valuable feedback" multiple times in a row, I think you should try and find ways to minimize that repetition. I am not a professional writer but as a reader that is my advice, others may disagree with me.
Overall i'm loving the story and am very much looking forward to what is going to happen next.
I thoroughly enjoyed Ch. 03 as it seems you are starting to develop the story more here. For Ch. 01 and Ch. 02 I felt the description did not accurately describe the story as written, but now in my opinion I feel the description tells of what is happening even though it is not blatantly obvious in the chapter; but the description of Ch. 03 is very accurate in what is written and taking place. Looking forward to Ch. 04 as now I am seeing a reaction from mommy.
(Please take my comments as a compliment and only and expression of my opinion. My comments are not criticism as I am not a writing critic nor do I pretend to be)
English
Alright you big tease!
Heh! Heh! Now please get down to the mother and son showing each other what they seem to both want. Next chapter, please!
Just let me say a big SO BE IT! to the last commenter.
Chapeters one and two are the set up for chapter 3 in which the long anticipated sexual union spills over. I understand chapter 2 receiving a low rating number. It is nothing happens there except the gradual change in the mother's mindset. Well written...keep it up and please give us the rest soon!
Helping mother take a bath sounds like a good story to me.
Though this is developing nicely.
But I see the need for more dialogue, for the mum to come around to consider the idea.
Love how the story is developing
As a mother, I love how the story is slowly developing and exposing "Mom's" needs. I can feel the awakening, the arousal in the discussion and hopefully soon the submission.
Another boy's Mom ;-)
Woo Hoo. Moms on the 'simmer'
This story is coming along so very, VERY well.
The conscious and subconscious all conspiring to overwhelm Moms composure and prejudices.
Well done Susan.
TonyO
Very good plot
The plot of this story is wonderful, I am really loving way the mother is slowly showing signs of coming around to the son's way of thinking.
My only criticism is that you often repeat things a little too often. For example the son refers to his mothers feedback as "valuable feedback" multiple times in a row, I think you should try and find ways to minimize that repetition. I am not a professional writer but as a reader that is my advice, others may disagree with me.
Overall i'm loving the story and am very much looking forward to what is going to happen next.
Fantastic
What a great series of stories this is. Thank you for taking the time to write and share them.
Developing
I thoroughly enjoyed Ch. 03 as it seems you are starting to develop the story more here. For Ch. 01 and Ch. 02 I felt the description did not accurately describe the story as written, but now in my opinion I feel the description tells of what is happening even though it is not blatantly obvious in the chapter; but the description of Ch. 03 is very accurate in what is written and taking place. Looking forward to Ch. 04 as now I am seeing a reaction from mommy.
(Please take my comments as a compliment and only and expression of my opinion. My comments are not criticism as I am not a writing critic nor do I pretend to be)
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to Mom Strips Naked for Nude Day Ch. 03 or
More submissions by SusanJillParker.