This story is smooth, powerful, compelling and keeps me on edge waiting for the next installment, THANKS!
by
Anonymous08/21/12
Oh, come on!!
This story gets better with every chapter and you've got me drooling for more. BUT, leaving where you left off has me feeling like I was robbed of at least another page! BUT THEN AGAIN, I'm really just being selfish in wanting more, and then some. Your tale here definitely has the beginnings of becoming a classic. Wow!
by
Anonymous08/21/12
different story lines are problematic on literotica,
as it has been a while since I read the prologue, but it was good that you told us where to look. However, since the hellhound has joined another line about Selena, etc.; it would have been better if the two stories were better integrated. The implication is that this hellhound can speak in both forms too (from the first paragraph), and that she cares nothing for her charge, as the little girl was not mentioned--is this what you intended?
Sorry for the confusion. Shaevre can speak her native tongue in either shape. However she cannot speak any form of human speech in the four-footed form. Arrax can. She can speak several human tongues in her bipedal form. She's a very bright girl, and would have boned up on where it was that she had contracted to go for this assignment. That would have come to her as simply prep work before the trip.
In the prologue, she was just on her way down, and from her point of view at that time, it was a job, and she was at least a little pleased that there wasn't warfare in it, since she'd had a bellyful by then. At the time of the chapter in question, Shaevre has been at the Merren outpost which is Dahlgren's home for perhaps 2 years, and she's fallen in love with her young charge. Nahl'een is a little sweetheart who can charm the socks off most adults in no time, and it's not used as a vehicle by her - unless maybe to get a little more candy.
I wanted a little stark contrast in this character and the Xer culture. They're quite advanced and yet carry the failings of any advanced and mature culture - hence Shaevre's trouble even being noticed. If she appeals to you, then I can say that there is another side of her which I have not yet revealed, though Arrax hinted at it in his praise of her. She doesn't need anything much, but give her a reason and better, give her a weapon as well, and 'kickass' becomes rather weak descriptive term.
I do hear your concern over the confusion. I tried to think of ways to streamline things and I'm not happy with my method, but it was the best that I thought I could do for this. That said, it's likely going to get a little more complex when I bring Dakhete forward.
by
Anonymous08/21/12
I'm hanging on every word :)
I've read from several different people on this website and your stories are the first that I have gotten hooked on. The details you put into each paragraph, the dialogue between characters, the story line itself, it all has me hooked and waiting for the next chapter! Absolutely wonderful, to be honest just as hooking as reading the twilight series, hunger games, or a James Patterson novel. There's some lust-filled scenes in there for sure but its definitely more about the story and a bit of romance than it is the sex. Please keep writing :)
A real page turner ....
This story is smooth, powerful, compelling and keeps me on edge waiting for the next installment, THANKS!
Oh, come on!!
This story gets better with every chapter and you've got me drooling for more. BUT, leaving where you left off has me feeling like I was robbed of at least another page! BUT THEN AGAIN, I'm really just being selfish in wanting more, and then some. Your tale here definitely has the beginnings of becoming a classic. Wow!
different story lines are problematic on literotica,
as it has been a while since I read the prologue, but it was good that you told us where to look. However, since the hellhound has joined another line about Selena, etc.; it would have been better if the two stories were better integrated. The implication is that this hellhound can speak in both forms too (from the first paragraph), and that she cares nothing for her charge, as the little girl was not mentioned--is this what you intended?
A lot of things are problematic on Literotica
Sorry for the confusion. Shaevre can speak her native tongue in either shape. However she cannot speak any form of human speech in the four-footed form. Arrax can. She can speak several human tongues in her bipedal form. She's a very bright girl, and would have boned up on where it was that she had contracted to go for this assignment. That would have come to her as simply prep work before the trip.
In the prologue, she was just on her way down, and from her point of view at that time, it was a job, and she was at least a little pleased that there wasn't warfare in it, since she'd had a bellyful by then. At the time of the chapter in question, Shaevre has been at the Merren outpost which is Dahlgren's home for perhaps 2 years, and she's fallen in love with her young charge. Nahl'een is a little sweetheart who can charm the socks off most adults in no time, and it's not used as a vehicle by her - unless maybe to get a little more candy.
I wanted a little stark contrast in this character and the Xer culture. They're quite advanced and yet carry the failings of any advanced and mature culture - hence Shaevre's trouble even being noticed. If she appeals to you, then I can say that there is another side of her which I have not yet revealed, though Arrax hinted at it in his praise of her. She doesn't need anything much, but give her a reason and better, give her a weapon as well, and 'kickass' becomes rather weak descriptive term.
I do hear your concern over the confusion. I tried to think of ways to streamline things and I'm not happy with my method, but it was the best that I thought I could do for this. That said, it's likely going to get a little more complex when I bring Dakhete forward.
I'm hanging on every word :)
I've read from several different people on this website and your stories are the first that I have gotten hooked on. The details you put into each paragraph, the dialogue between characters, the story line itself, it all has me hooked and waiting for the next chapter! Absolutely wonderful, to be honest just as hooking as reading the twilight series, hunger games, or a James Patterson novel. There's some lust-filled scenes in there for sure but its definitely more about the story and a bit of romance than it is the sex. Please keep writing :)
I like Arrax. Too bad he isn't available to be Shaevre's mate. He's a great commanding officer.
Wow!
Great twist with Shaevre's story :)
Jason
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