"While driving to her place, Graham was texting Annabelle... "
I would have continued the sentence thus: "... and for that reason did not see that the traffic ahead of him had stopped." Then I would make the story one about Annabelle mourning his untimely death. But that's just me.
by
Anonymous08/19/12
some of the worst drivel i've yet seen on Literotica!
Your storytelling skills need a great deal of improvement. This honestly appears to have been written by a 6th grade school kid. You really need to read about a hundred other authors works on this site and learn about things such as character development & plot, descriptions, etc.
by
Anonymous08/19/12
Dafuq
How the fuck is this in the anal category. There's like 4 sentences of anal, the rest is shit. If there was a garbage category I would stick this in there.
by
Anonymous08/20/12
Don't let these negative commentators get to you.
There are lots of a**holes out there. Ignore them. Keep writing stories.
English
"While driving to her place, Graham was texting Annabelle... "
I would have continued the sentence thus: "... and for that reason did not see that the traffic ahead of him had stopped." Then I would make the story one about Annabelle mourning his untimely death. But that's just me.
some of the worst drivel i've yet seen on Literotica!
Your storytelling skills need a great deal of improvement. This honestly appears to have been written by a 6th grade school kid. You really need to read about a hundred other authors works on this site and learn about things such as character development & plot, descriptions, etc.
Dafuq
How the fuck is this in the anal category. There's like 4 sentences of anal, the rest is shit. If there was a garbage category I would stick this in there.
Don't let these negative commentators get to you.
There are lots of a**holes out there. Ignore them. Keep writing stories.
WOW
That was really BAD.
You suck.
I loved it!
Good story keep writing"D
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