All Comments on 'Would You?'

by ArtemisLover

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  • 4 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago

EDIT!!! Just in the first 4-5 lines there are words missing from the sentences, not to mention grammar and punctuation. I gave up reading about half way through.

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
Great read, but indeed edit

This was great, but you need to edit and cut the paragraphs a bit shorter. Still I thought it was one of the best on the site, at least recently. So keep up the good writing, but edit the damn thing.

joelafayettejoelafayetteover 11 years ago
maybe the next installment will be better

Hard to see where you're going with this, but it's got potential.

AnonymousAnonymousover 11 years ago
Yeah

Don't see where it's going. So far it has achieved just a BIG YAWN!

Anonymous
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