L'il Sis Ch. 03

Who in the hell cares?

Tired story line strung out too long.

GIVE IT UP

YOUR STORY IT NOT BAD. IT'S TO SLOW ,ALL YOUR DOING IS WASTING OUR TIME . GIVE IT UP. YOU LOST A FAN.

Dude, just get it done already.

As I said before, you should get to the good stuff by at least Ch 2. This is starting to be a bore.

I like your story and now we should get into the Dare part; as they go outside. They need to see the bare truth and do it !! Please write a few more chapters and help us.
Thanks !

Looking forward to more chapters!

Nothing wrong with a little build-up. Looking forward to more of your work. Can hardly wait until Ally slips on her thong bikini and joins Ry in the hot tub. Lots of potential for a variety of things to occur in future chapters........

Thanks

Thank you for your comments. I will make the chapters longer and do a better job of proof reading and dialogue. I apologize for the slow start. Your comments will help me do a better job. Chapter 4 has been submitted and is much longer and hotter. I will try to improve in chapter 5, which will probably be the finale uses readers want me to continue. Thank you for your patience.

Thanks

It has taken me a while to figure out the posting process and how to view the comments section. I have not been ignoring them, I just did not understand how to access them.

definitely add more than one little chapter at a time. combine some!

so-so

still needs a GOOD EDITOR and you should delete all three chapters and post them as one. these chapters are way to short and you have a lot of usless information going with very little buildup of the REAL plot. as you see below you are losing readers with your slow sloppy writing and too short chapters.

I like it

The direction is good, I like the writing. But as others have said, I'm startin to get blue balls! Let's get some heavy petting going on at the very least.

nice

i like your style,the way you build up until the final climax.please continou on the same path

Another Chapter Please

There's more to this story....get to it.

Please tell me there will be a Ch. 4...

restless

Its good but not much has happened yet, please upload Ch. 04 soon :)