All Comments on 'Birthday Blowjob'

One minute Joyce is telling the story and next minute it is Tim.

It spoilt it

when the punctuation is poor - when it's virtually non-existent, it becomes almost impossible. Seriously, you need an editor - urgently!

This needs re-editing. It goes from first person to third person midway through, has many run-on sentences, and is poorly edited.

I would have walked out and divorced her.

Enjoy the Birthday divorce.

another worthless cheating story any man that would allow or stay with a wife that cheated is worthless himself.

The only head that is slick is his little head. His big head is devoid of anything, so there is nothing there to be slick.

No divorce needed, moralistic anon twit! Sex is sex, it's fun, and people do not belong to each other unless they choose to. You don't like it, don't do it, but don't put others down for their choices. (Story needs an edit but the basic idea is great)

"You don't like it, don't do it, but don't put others down for their choices. "

<P>

How about following your own statement? Your comment was nothing but putting down others for daring to have a different opinion. You also doubled down on you hypocrisy by blasting the "anon twit" in an anonymous comment.

she was a little to comfortable with sucking and fucking strangers for it to have been a first. and hubby needs some balls.

where is the erotica?

What a way to start

Me and my husband should be

My husband and I

Stopped reading then.

Poor grammar.

Is your second language Or third.

Taking a video of the scene was an excellent idea ... bravo ;-)

the Literotica moderators while they were busy sandbagging. Hope you're doing well there East Coasters (from a Celt far away but accustomed to savage sea).

This wasn't offensive so much as dull as all hell. 2* I didn't like it and it had a faggety ending.

Kinda similar theme... but this submission was TWICE as good as 'My Born Again Christian Wife' by Shelbakk! (That is damning with faint praise!) Therefore -

2*

You even change narrator mid-story. And no one gets that drunk as to excuse this level of behaviour.

And then to top it all off you change characters in the middle of another run-on sentence like it was the most natural thing in the world. EDITOR NEEDED

Might have been more entertaining if you had taken more tome with editing, etc.

:)

Dickhead writes another cuck and whore story.

Sorry, no way. I wouldn't let my wife give a blow job to my best friend I've know since grade school no matter how special the occasion. Also, my best friend wouldn't ever consider accepting if offered. Bro's before Ho's

I would have divorced her before the party just for using the phrase "me and my husband Tim " instead of " my husband Tim and I ". To compound the proble she used the lazy word "gotten ". She should have used a proper word like had. She also called trousers pants. These are all divorcable crimes.

I understand that Americans have a fear of being seen as getting above their station and as a result speak in pidgin English so it us known what class they come from but when writing for an international audience you need to lift the game , as it were, to the level of that audience.

I see Slickhead has several stories on Literotica. I hope the others are better than this one.

Haters gonna hate

There was nothing to explain why out of the blue this guy would ask for a blowjob and she immediately agrees and takes him someplace to do it. Then, without any reason other than "alcohol" she tells her husband and he is fine and she asks for more cock and it gets all arranged.

Not going to complain about the topic but the writing was so poor it was not erotic or enjoyable at all.

Ic69hunter gonna be an ass.