Great story! I'm a guy for the record, and I have to say the lesbian stories tend to be the best ones on the Literotica site.
The only criticisms I'd offer are: A) Break up the dialogue; and B) You should've written the entire story and not made a promise to finish it if it got a good response. Finish the story, and then perhaps write a part two about Jenna and Danielle either together or separately. For example, what happened to Danielle before the girls met?
And don't be too harsh on Cody. He was blitzed.
by
Anonymous11/03/12
enjoy skinny dipping
loved your story- would like to read the rest- do they start a relationship?
by
Anonymous11/03/12
More...
Great story, you've got me hooked already. Need to get into more details. Please hurry with the next chapter...
I really like the story but the promise of more if you get good reviews is a bit tacky. I agree that dialog from different people belongs in separate paragraphs.
English
More please!
Great story! I'm a guy for the record, and I have to say the lesbian stories tend to be the best ones on the Literotica site.
The only criticisms I'd offer are: A) Break up the dialogue; and B) You should've written the entire story and not made a promise to finish it if it got a good response. Finish the story, and then perhaps write a part two about Jenna and Danielle either together or separately. For example, what happened to Danielle before the girls met?
And don't be too harsh on Cody. He was blitzed.
enjoy skinny dipping
loved your story- would like to read the rest- do they start a relationship?
More...
Great story, you've got me hooked already. Need to get into more details. Please hurry with the next chapter...
Great hook
I really like the story but the promise of more if you get good reviews is a bit tacky. I agree that dialog from different people belongs in separate paragraphs.
need second part
please finish story just got to the good bit
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