All Comments on 'A Daughter's Love Ch. 03'

While interesting, the plot is somewhat problematic. A few points:

Culver doesn't seem to have any particularly coherent motivation for this scheme of his - it's a particular bit of cruelty which doesn't seem to be providing him much benefit. "Wants to put his board of directors through some hoops" is weak as an excuse.

The threat he's holding over Alec doesn't seem to make a great deal of sense. If it's a well-known fact that Alec is actually -married- to his own daughter, without this causing him any apparent scandal or business trouble, then why is the confession of a single encounter, whose accuracy Elise would vehemently deny with a reasonably plausible explanation, meant to be so dangerous? The world you describe here doesn't have to be strictly realistic, but surely publically-known incest is either a career-ender, or it isn't. In the story so far, it seems like it's both.

If Elise has been 'friends' with Francine for three years, how is she unaware of the apparently unhidden relationship that she has with her father?

It's a minor realism complaint, but the threat of firing doesn't really work. Needless to say, an employer can't demand that someone commit incest and then fire them if they refuse; if he tried, he'd face the lawsuit of the century. This is resolved without much difficulty, though, if one supposes that Culver fabricated evidence of some justification for the firing.

More seriously implausible is this line: "He had forced him to sign a paper stating he could never tell her they were being set up." The entire blackmail going on here is obviously secret, not something that Culver could admit to in the courtroom, so the idea of Alec being forced into a contract of secrecy about it is ridiculous. What happens if he reveals the truth, Culver sues him?

Those are the bigger things I noticed. In most stories, I'd just gloss over them - the coherence of the plot isn't usually the major concern in this kind of fiction. But it seems like you're trying to write a complete story, not just a spank scene; that being so, these are issues that you may want to keep in mind.

Put simply it makes ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE!! Gee dad sure did give in quickly. He didn't even attempt (VERY HARD) to come up with ways out of the situation. Good luck with future chapters!

There are some major holes in the plot, the least of which is WHY a romance author is so famous as to be ruined by the release of a scandalous tape. Most authors or "celebrities" know that any scandal is a good thing. Most people also know that an audio tape can be edited to say anything that a lowdown bastard like Culver and his daughter want. Simple fact is, there are more holes in this plot than in Swiss cheese!

I don't understand Culver's tactics since he has already lost any leverage he had as the "tapes" had already been released. Try explaining that one away . . . .