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bymrtinymeat©
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by Anonymous

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by Anonymous01/21/13

Interesting story

You have a good perspective but should try to be more realistic. An older asian woman may be of great help . Keep writing many others are in the same boat.

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by Anonymous01/25/13

good effort

I liked your story but you need to work on your grammar as it was bad in parts. Also some of the way you wrote the chav women's dialogue probably sounded OK in your head but for us people unfamiliar with accent it was difficult to decipher at times. I suggest you remember that writing is different to speaking, which is a common mistake amateur writers make. Keep writing as it is the only way you can improve.

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