by crazyhotsexpot
I actually want to know more of what happens. I think there could be a story here beyond the sex too. Nice job.
i can't believe that was your first story! it was really really good =]
could be a bit more filthy...but I liked it all the same...welcome
good story, nice pacing, but in future, please proofread for errors!!! it may seem anal but it really interrupts the flow when there are words missing or misspelled.
But I agree with previous commenter about spelling. It seems like such a little thing, but for someone who reads avidly, it disrupts the flow, and then we're more focused on the editing problems than the story.
I really liked this one but agree about the spelling. I disagree with the suggestion that it be more "filthy". I liked the fact that he was dominant and spanks her etc. but also like his tender side. :-) I would definitely like to see more and agree that there could be more to this story than just the sex...but don't stop that!! :-) 5 stars from me.
omfg one of the best stories i've ever read! You must continue with the next chapter!
Kristy Feirce
It was unexpectedly sweet for a nonconsent story. I enjoyed it.immensely (: