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Baby Kenny

bydemure101©
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Comments (4)
by Anonymous

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by Desejo01/06/13

At first, I thought the second line was a typo. Kenny, in the US at least, is generally a boy's name. But the second line says "she's there". It is a bit bizarre to think that the woman is checking to make sure she herself is there, so the reader naturally assumes (also because of the title) that the woman is checking on someone else. Namely, Baby Kenny.
The last stanza brings it all together. I may have it wrong, but I love that it made me read, re-read and think.
I was tempted to suggest that the location and baby's name be more explicit to avoid confusion, for example by calling the baby Mary or John - names that really are not used by the opposite gender regardless of where you are in the world -but now I think the confusion is useful.
You use 's contractions a lot in your poetry - personally I don't like that, but it's a matter of taste I guess - and probably flow. I'm no expert in that department.
Another fine poem.

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by greenmountaineer01/07/13

Made me think of London bombing during WWII for some reason. I suppose it could just as well be the Gaza Strip.

The alliteration of "s" followed by consonants got me tongue tied.

Isn't "roofed and sheltered" redundant?

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by tazz31701/07/13

WHEN THE MIND GOES

the brain remains static. TK U MLJ LV NV

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by Jay35201/13/13

Nice little piece. You convey the emotion of it well.

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