Simply put the best so far
please,PLEASE write more I
loved it.
by
Anonymous05/23/06
HOT!HOT!HOT!
Please write more,very good better than alot of the ones i have read in here.
Also please make them longer.
by
Anonymous06/08/08
hahaha wtf was this
i laughed all the way through this, one minute he's mentionining himself as if he is god by claimin he knows what she thinks and she's going to like, then the small dicked knobhead tell in story words what he thinks she's thinking like he's female, we all know either females or guys who don't just think with their cocks make better erotica writers, COME BACK AND WRITE GOOD STORIES WHEN YOUR DICK ISN'T CONTROLLING YOUR EVERY WORD you egotistical copy-cat styled fake writing peice of shit.
In the third paragraph, Sam looked at his sister "now noticing how sexy she was". 2 paragraphs later, he says he's been watching her masturbate for a year. WHAT?! He watched her masturbate for a year without realizing how sexy she was? And the sex was rushed.
by
Anonymous05/03/10
shit
middle of a story no beginning or end. you never said if they were home for a visit or the summer or if they were comuting to college from home. very little was said about thier past if they are living at college and just home for the summer then the best way to go would be for them to call the college and ask about getting jobs. then before the parents get back move back to college and stay there never coming home again. also like it was said before big screw ups he just realizes she is sexy but has been watching her materbate for years is he blind or are you stupid don't you reread your stuff before posting get an editor and do a rewrite
by
Anonymous08/06/13
horrible
i think this was to predictive you could what would happen next
English
HOTTTT!!!!!
Simply put the best so far
please,PLEASE write more I
loved it.
HOT!HOT!HOT!
Please write more,very good better than alot of the ones i have read in here.
Also please make them longer.
hahaha wtf was this
i laughed all the way through this, one minute he's mentionining himself as if he is god by claimin he knows what she thinks and she's going to like, then the small dicked knobhead tell in story words what he thinks she's thinking like he's female, we all know either females or guys who don't just think with their cocks make better erotica writers, COME BACK AND WRITE GOOD STORIES WHEN YOUR DICK ISN'T CONTROLLING YOUR EVERY WORD you egotistical copy-cat styled fake writing peice of shit.
Pay Attention!
In the third paragraph, Sam looked at his sister "now noticing how sexy she was". 2 paragraphs later, he says he's been watching her masturbate for a year. WHAT?! He watched her masturbate for a year without realizing how sexy she was? And the sex was rushed.
shit
middle of a story no beginning or end. you never said if they were home for a visit or the summer or if they were comuting to college from home. very little was said about thier past if they are living at college and just home for the summer then the best way to go would be for them to call the college and ask about getting jobs. then before the parents get back move back to college and stay there never coming home again. also like it was said before big screw ups he just realizes she is sexy but has been watching her materbate for years is he blind or are you stupid don't you reread your stuff before posting get an editor and do a rewrite
horrible
i think this was to predictive you could what would happen next
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