All Comments on 'Tammy's Wolf and Mate Ch. 02'

I hope that all of you enjoy this chapter as much as the first. I am especially proud of this story because my character's are based on people very dear to me. I welcome your comments and suggestions. For a little teaser.....the next chapter will be based on Tammy's stay at the Armstrong Pack....Have a great day keep smiling and happy reading

But I have a couple of suggestions. One would be to get a proof reader or editor. The dialogue between characters was hard to read. Secondly, I am definitely curious about Tammy's past. If she was a werewolf why was she put up for adoption with humans? I am looking forward to the next chapter.

thank you very much for letting me know. I was attempting to create conversations that just flowed with out saying he said she exclaimed ect. Apparently I failed miserably at it but I do have someone that is working on correcting the problem with me so I can give my readers a stellar story to read. I'd appreciate any and all comments that make me a better writer...please keep the complements coming. I hope you like the story thus far....keep smiling and never stop reading erotica

Each time a different person speaks it should be a new paragraph - not complaining - just some constructive criticism. Nice story so far.

thank you anonymous for the suggestion. It makes a lot of sense and will make future chapters easier to read....thanks for taking the time to make a comment and I hope you liked the story despite the conversation mix up.....

Your story is great. I hope we don't have to wait too long to read the next installment. Keep up the good work.

I like your story, but use quotations to emphasize each speaker. It throws off the conversation between the characters. Also, you should. explain strange actions or response... such as why Will ignored Tammy the first time he saw her in the club, if she were his mate. Just awkward there for a moment. I like the idea of a wolf vampire thing. I hope you have a good conflict for their budding romance. Keep writing, looking forward to your developing story. If you need an editor please let me know.

So glad to see that this was a least sort of recently published. I just had my heart broken with the last story I got sucked into because the author never submitted the final chapters. Keep up the story line, it has really good potential and I look forward to more chapters. I'm a huge vampire and werewolf fan so this story made my ovaries explode.

Interesting story. Good imagination. Werewolf legends do NOT include immortality, but cancer and heart trouble taking out her parents does NOT sound right. Very rapid healing IS part of the mystique. Vampire legend does NOT include waking up in daylight hours...except old ones under emergency conditions.

The author and the editor need to attend to basic grammar as well as punctuation and consistency of story line. Several elementary errors reduce the credibility of the whole endeavor! I strongly recommend putting the work aside for a few days, then re-reading it with a very critical eye ... not 'Do I know what I mean here?' but 'Would a reader seeing this for the first time be able to misunderstand?' OF COURSE the author knows what she means!

For example...who is Maria? Yeah, by context, a reader can kinda figure it out. Does the author, with one name within commas, actually let us know immediately, without doubt who Maria is? 'Sophia's mother, Maria, looked at Tammy ...'

I love your story and remember it is your story so write it your way. To lick obviously you didn't read the story to well I guess you were to busy trying to find things to complain about-the mother who died of cancer and father who passed away were her adopted parents. Also I have read hundreds of vamp and were stories on lit and other sites and they are all different according to the author because guess what they are all characters of the authors creation, so if she wants daytime vamps they can be daytime vamped and it will not be the first story I have read like that. Sorry sedge for the rant but I am so tired of seeing negative comments about story content that is strictly up to the author and oh God don't get me started on complaints about grammer and word usage. If the want perfectly edited works go buy a book(not that that will help) not come and hitch about it on a site like Lit. I love this story.