All Comments on 'Maya Dark Zero Suit'

Needs some work on the form and perhaps there are too many suits in the first stanza, but I liked your ambition.

was better than this ... but again the content continues to engage. Leave the suit; bring the Canoli.

somewhere between a sonnet and an incantation

you have to do some serious thinking here. i.e why

the way of all flesh;

do you have a reason?

Which preys and plays in the ways of all flesh; of flesh? of the flesh,

true, way of the flesh is a referent

consider dropping some of the ...ings

very good instincts here

5ed