All Comments on 'Connie's Request'

by man_as_dog

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  • 5 Comments
ErotonautErotonautabout 11 years ago
Sad note to end on

Regrets can eat away at your soul.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 11 years ago
From Ennis Elf

Nice story, good buildup, great climax (pun intended), finished well.

Ib_SaysIb_Saysover 8 years ago

Feels like a pretty abrupt way to end things, not to mention in that small 'epilogue', we get no sense of how things are for the protagonist, aside from the fact that he travels, what kind of job does he have? is he married? Is he satisfied with his life, aside from that bit of nostalgia etc.

Aside from the sense that he chose to say goodbye forever, that conversation almost seems like the precurser to an affair, or at least it has the ingredients for one.

LordSlamdawggLordSlamdawggalmost 8 years ago
Very versatile story ....could have gone so many ways

Wistful was as good as any a way to end it . Enjoyed almost every word man _ as_dog wrote. Any quibbles I make are because I'm greedy and wanted more. The narrator and Connie needed a scene where there is a ' a moment ' that gives her the idea that he should be the one to initiate her. The narrator was a graceful carnal tutor - great mix of sensitivity and seeking satisfaction . Connie chose well.

I will say Sarah's character seemed to be missing a scene or two to establish her role but excellent drama when she rebukes the narrator. I'm not sure why the narrator was wistful over Connie. She didn't appreciate him. Another mystery left by author. Still I really enjoyed all of what author shared . The story went from cynical to sentimental and finally to sexy multiple times. Only the too tier of writers can do that.

Full marks. *****

Jake7518Jake7518over 3 years ago

Well written, but needs an ending.

Thanks for your writing keep it up.

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