All Comments on 'The Proposal Ch. 01'

by puppdogg83

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  • 18 Comments
1Martiniman1Martinimanalmost 11 years ago
Very nice

A very nice start, and I'm looking forward to see where you take this.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 11 years ago

Having a hard time with current rating, Looking forward to next chapter! this should have at least a 4 star rating going!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 11 years ago

Awesome start..please continue..maybe she can make him lick her sweaty armpits, sniff and lick her dirty underwears..feet licking etc

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 11 years ago
um

ok were is the sense in this, if she cant wint it fair and square? why is she cheating like hell?

RpierzRpierzalmost 11 years ago
So much for rules

She set them & won by cheating, she said things like slapping were off the table & that's what she did when he got his 1 & only pin. OK. I await when he challenges her to rematch & tromps her, when she gets angry he should simply remind her of all the crap she did during the time she made him HER slave; break her as she will try & do to him.

megman23megman23almost 11 years ago
Ass slave

She should definitely make his tongue go deep in her ass, force him him to lick her after a long workout, and take deep breaths of her ripe ass. Keep up the great work!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 11 years ago
cuckold

you should make her have a guy cum in her asshole thn let him eat it out

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 11 years ago
Nice one.

Perfect and well written story. Plus, much better cunnilingus that is usually found in "erotica". Love it.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 11 years ago
Good start

Ok good start, now she needs to explore her comme side and use him as alittle slut boy. Could start with some strap on fun, maybe have him service some of her friends, male and female and start his transformation into a sissy boy.

AnonymousAnonymousover 10 years ago
very good i liked

i think it needs to go slow and make him lick pussy and ass as instructed and then have her girlfriends over for a bit of humilation now that he is dominated

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 10 years ago
vice versa

could you please do some chapters on what keith would have done please I would like to see that as well plz plz plz

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 9 years ago
no way

she cheated by grabbing and squeezing balls, he should have shoved two or three fingers in her ass when in the scissor hold(that would have slowed her down)then slap the cheating bitch back

mrwidehorizonsmrwidehorizonsover 8 years ago
Great start!

So what if she cheated, it's all in good sexy fun! I'd love to be hers for a weekend!

GoodhueGoodhueover 8 years ago
So Where's Chapter 2?!

GREAT start to this totally unfinished story.

I hate it though when writers pussy out and don't finish!

And this one had such great promise.

AnonymousAnonymousover 3 years ago

Why doesn't he just either kill her with a knife or beat the shit out of her? Seriously, hit her while she's out with a hammer. Or just jump her. He should kill her she is an asshole.

MasterMickaMasterMickaalmost 3 years ago

J'ai trouver le récit intéressant pour un début.

Mise en situation, défis, jeux et esclavage.

Le seul hic est de savoir pourquoi elle fait cela. Ce serait I yeressant qu'il y au une raison derrière.

Je lirais la suite si elle existe.

AnonymousAnonymousover 1 year ago

Hope there is more to come!!!!

InfiniteXaosInfiniteXaos4 months ago

This seems to lack any affection or care whatsoever. She just wanted an excuse to hurt him...

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