First Time Swing with Friends

Reads like a good time!

I enjoyed your hot story immensely. Thanks for sharing!

Where did Lisa go? She missed all the fun.

What?????

Sarah? Lisa? Claire????????????? the guy has no idea who is there or not..... very annoying.

Incoherent stupor

of a cuckold writer,he can't write a good erotic story: talking about a wife with triple personality and couldn't differentiate which one is which.

Names Changed to Protect the Innocent?

Was this story written by JimJim or JimLisa or SarahJim or JimSarah?

Waste of 30 seconds.

No thanks.

Is anybody sure what they just read? That was about as confusing as words on paper can possibly be. I couldn't figure out who was married to who and what they were doing or..... oh hell it was just a clusterfuck of words!!!

Imagery is very good despite the shifting identies

Sheesh people are critical here.

I realise this is only your fifth contribution (third, if you conflate the initial two-parters), but opening with a promise of "characters that resemble real life, deficiencies and all" leaves you open to criticism when the action starts without any kind of preamble and the only difference between the two couples is their current partner and our narrator's decision to ignore the rules the four agreed beforehand. The Sarah/Lisa slip was careless (I thought for a moment there were five people in the room), but the main area where I felt let down was the absence of backstory or inner monologue. Did the impetus for this swing originate with Greg & Claire, Tom & Sarah, all four or maybe just the girls? This is Greg's first experience of swapping, so how does he feel about watching Claire take Tom's cock in her mouth? Does he now worry that Sarah will confess to Tom about breaking the rules and his friend will expect Claire to reciprocate? How did the rules evolve in the first place? All of this would add immeasurably to the "real life" underpinning you said you were aiming for.

Hope that helps.

Conspiracy

Can four people 'conspire' to violate restrictions that those same four people established in the FIRST place? I didn't think so!

If those restrictions had been accepted earlier in the evening, especially if they were considered to be important, why were the readers NOT informed of them before the LAST paragraph!

I would bet a 39E titty-fuck that Sarah's REAL name is Lisa. I'll also bet she would be surprised to find out that her in-the-clear name has been leaked!

Who's on first?

I couldn't get more than a few paragraphs into this before it began to feel like an Abbot and Castello routine. I couldn't even figure out how MANY people were involved, much less the names of the characters.

let me see... a fucking mistake in the very first sentence...

MORON!

Lisa or Sarah

Lisa or Sarah make up your mind who is sucking your cock!!!

Leaving you top marks for a nice story and dealing with idiot comments. Keep the stories flowing!;)

Lost me in the first 2 paragraphs

Character and location development. Please.

Needs a second part...