Anony 4/19 - Not re-write so much as finish up with most likely scenario
Anony 4/19 . . . actually my stories are more sci-fi. Here in the LW category, I am more inspired by others. Some make me want to figure out what will happen (my 'slant') . . . with others I have a some idea about what would happen in the real world (not my 'slant', just recognizing the more likely outcomes).
That latter speaks to how plausible a story is (as someone else pointed out). Now, many defend the implausible saying something like, 'Hey, it's fiction!', (implying it's okay to be implausible). While that's true, implausibility often takes away from the story. Dangerouslyd has a good story going here. It's well written in my opinion, and I'm really eager to see it play out. If kept plausible the story gets really good (in my opinion). The problem with implausibility is that anything goes then. Here's an example of some of that 'shit writing' with an implausible ending to the above:
>> He waved his magic BTB wand and his wife Mabel and Paul (wherever he was) both caught fire and died screaming and begging him to forgive them. Then they went to hell, where they were kept as sex slaves by demented psycho demons and were forced to watch reruns of political debates from the early 21st century.
Now, that was a BTB ending, but not very plausible (I mean really . . . nobody'll ever keep copies of those debates . . . even in hell). I feel that implausibility can turn a very good story into a merely good or average one. Plausible endings, on the other hand, often leave us more satisfied. I do like Dangerouslyd's stuff . . . good ideas, and the writing moves you along. I just felt a bit odd about the conclusion.
Oh, here's some more highly implausible shit writing . . .
>> After 1000 years in hell, Mabel and Paul were 'rescued' by Cleo the Cantankerous Crow, who pulled them from hell and dropped them in purgatory. They married there, which was a horrible choice. Mabel found Paul despicable, and wondered how she ever could have cheated with him. Paul, for his part, found Mabel attractive, but couldn't stand how she always compared him negatively to her husband from a millennia ago when she'd been alive. He was really sick of it!! Cleo found this so amusing that she almost forgot to be cantankerous for a bit. It seemed like shortly after being rescued form physical hell, they quickly created their own mental hell (which can be much worse). "Selfish fools!!", thought Cleo cantankerously as she flew away.
Now there's some shit writing with my 'slant' on it. (There's more to the story, but Cleo asked me not to tell you right now . . . )
by
Anonymous05/17/16
Sorry c24j
Good argument, but this is a he said - she said situation. The author doesn't say, but it appears the attack on her lover was many years ago. You have to assume that he took enough precautions when he did it so as not to get caught. So... a wife comes to the police with a story of how her husband crippled the guy and she has no proof to back up her claim. The police look at the situation where her husband has 'lost' all him money gambling and is leaving her, look at how long ago the attack happened, look at their current overwhelming case load and tell her to forget it. End of story.
by
Anonymous07/02/16
Wow, what a load
Something is seriously, seriously wrong with someone who wastes his life to lying in wait to take revenge on his wife. I know he's a hero to some of you twisted fucks, but jeezy petes, what a loser.
1 *, cuz I can't do fewer.
by
Anonymous08/29/16
Surprised?
Are you surprised by all the vitriolic comments? Seems a guy who is violent is a jerk, a guy who runs away is a jerk, a guy who threw his cheating wife out is an ass and a jerk. Common theme!? Yes! Any guy who doesn't accept crap heaped on him is a jerk! Think not assholes!!!
by
Anonymous11/23/16
I'm Ambivalent
I don't think a little revenge is a bad thing when it comes to a cheating spouse, but
even as cold-blooded as I am (and trust me, I am), abandoning an old, sick woman
after all the years they were together is beyond cold-blooded, even for me. To me,
this story was just downright mean.
by
Anonymous01/26/17
never ever
Let reality ruin a fantasmically great flash revenge story.
Just smile chuckle give an atta boy exhortation and move on to your next read
English
c24j really?
c24j knows his stories are shit so he always rewrites other author's story with his slant on life.
Anony 4/19 - Not re-write so much as finish up with most likely scenario
Anony 4/19 . . . actually my stories are more sci-fi. Here in the LW category, I am more inspired by others. Some make me want to figure out what will happen (my 'slant') . . . with others I have a some idea about what would happen in the real world (not my 'slant', just recognizing the more likely outcomes).
That latter speaks to how plausible a story is (as someone else pointed out). Now, many defend the implausible saying something like, 'Hey, it's fiction!', (implying it's okay to be implausible). While that's true, implausibility often takes away from the story. Dangerouslyd has a good story going here. It's well written in my opinion, and I'm really eager to see it play out. If kept plausible the story gets really good (in my opinion). The problem with implausibility is that anything goes then. Here's an example of some of that 'shit writing' with an implausible ending to the above:
>> He waved his magic BTB wand and his wife Mabel and Paul (wherever he was) both caught fire and died screaming and begging him to forgive them. Then they went to hell, where they were kept as sex slaves by demented psycho demons and were forced to watch reruns of political debates from the early 21st century.
Now, that was a BTB ending, but not very plausible (I mean really . . . nobody'll ever keep copies of those debates . . . even in hell). I feel that implausibility can turn a very good story into a merely good or average one. Plausible endings, on the other hand, often leave us more satisfied. I do like Dangerouslyd's stuff . . . good ideas, and the writing moves you along. I just felt a bit odd about the conclusion.
Oh, here's some more highly implausible shit writing . . .
>> After 1000 years in hell, Mabel and Paul were 'rescued' by Cleo the Cantankerous Crow, who pulled them from hell and dropped them in purgatory. They married there, which was a horrible choice. Mabel found Paul despicable, and wondered how she ever could have cheated with him. Paul, for his part, found Mabel attractive, but couldn't stand how she always compared him negatively to her husband from a millennia ago when she'd been alive. He was really sick of it!! Cleo found this so amusing that she almost forgot to be cantankerous for a bit. It seemed like shortly after being rescued form physical hell, they quickly created their own mental hell (which can be much worse). "Selfish fools!!", thought Cleo cantankerously as she flew away.
Now there's some shit writing with my 'slant' on it. (There's more to the story, but Cleo asked me not to tell you right now . . . )
Sorry c24j
Good argument, but this is a he said - she said situation. The author doesn't say, but it appears the attack on her lover was many years ago. You have to assume that he took enough precautions when he did it so as not to get caught. So... a wife comes to the police with a story of how her husband crippled the guy and she has no proof to back up her claim. The police look at the situation where her husband has 'lost' all him money gambling and is leaving her, look at how long ago the attack happened, look at their current overwhelming case load and tell her to forget it. End of story.
Wow, what a load
Something is seriously, seriously wrong with someone who wastes his life to lying in wait to take revenge on his wife. I know he's a hero to some of you twisted fucks, but jeezy petes, what a loser.
1 *, cuz I can't do fewer.
Surprised?
Are you surprised by all the vitriolic comments? Seems a guy who is violent is a jerk, a guy who runs away is a jerk, a guy who threw his cheating wife out is an ass and a jerk. Common theme!? Yes! Any guy who doesn't accept crap heaped on him is a jerk! Think not assholes!!!
I'm Ambivalent
I don't think a little revenge is a bad thing when it comes to a cheating spouse, but
even as cold-blooded as I am (and trust me, I am), abandoning an old, sick woman
after all the years they were together is beyond cold-blooded, even for me. To me,
this story was just downright mean.
never ever
Let reality ruin a fantasmically great flash revenge story.
Just smile chuckle give an atta boy exhortation and move on to your next read
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