- All
Comments (4) - Add a
Comment - Send
Feedback Send private anonymous feedback to the author (click here to post a public comment instead).
| Literotica Toy Store ADULT TOY & DVD STORE FAST & DISCREET |
Literotica XXX Webcams 24/7 LIVE CAMS - FREE PREVIEW W/AUDIO! |
Literotica Adult Movies STREAMING ADULT MOVIES PAY PER MINUTE |
English
I gave you a five
cause I think you're a quick learner and it shows in this poem. This stanza~
it is all teeth, biting and clawing
nails rend as you drag me to you
our mouths crash together
tasting tongues and lips
you urgently reach down and force me
into you
the soft collision as I nail you to the floor
has almost no "telling," and that last line especially says a great deal with very few words, the trick being that you found just the right words. :)
Thanks for the 5
Pretty soon I'm going to start expecting more raps on the knuckles and harsher critiquing to help push me to the next level of writing :-)
OK
undressing is for humans
this is a good line, even great in context
the rest i've seem to have seen before
title is good
5ed - but newb 5
Thanks
. I appreciate the 5 and the comments, it seems like a sympathy fuck more than a genuine five hahaha I will accept it like a teenage boy in heat though :-)
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to too horny for foreplay or
More submissions by todski28.