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English
ok
but weirdly written
.
This must be the day of shit. I've never seen so many bad stories posted on one day.
POTENTIAL...
to be a great series. The premise is possible. The actions are believable. The writing is adequate. It just needs to jump out at the reader a little more.. Possibles and believeables are, at best, "adequate." With some polish and continuation of the trip, with their experiences, this should start to hold reader interest and speculation on where it may go. Thank you.
Needs to jump more...
Was OK story to start, then died, but the whole 'idea' was a good one.. ergo, needs a lot of work.
Condoms
The writer won'ts them stuffing up is ass with barbed wire to stop him writting any more rubbish hes a wanker
Amazing
This is a fantastic story
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