F2: Absolute Pitch

Don't know quite what to think about that. I feel sad for Lucy and Chris, but that was a great way to work in the music. :) Nicely written -- and I suppose the fact that I don't know what to think means it'll stay with me for a bit.

I agree with Pennlady, I am not sure what to think while some moments i thought wow! other moments left me deflated. Good job, I think... I worry if all of us from the contest leave our names with our comments it will be too easy to tell whose who so I am leaving this anonymously but i am looking forward to see who wrote this one and maybe look at their other stories.

WOW

This is just wow. I get it though.It's bittersweet. A life of second fiddle to the music. Just like husbands who are married to their work. It worked with the ingredients, well written.

Bravo!

Love and passion is not always returned, but it doesn't cease to be something that touches your soul nevertheless. This is the tale of such a passion. Very original storytelling.

It started a bit slowly with the back story bogging down the beginning but by the time I was halfway into the page, I was enjoying it too much. It built up momentum and thundered to an absolutely lovely finish. There could be no other ending.

I loved the idea and the way that the contents of the basket were used... very seamless. The use of music was especially well done. Some of the writing was definitely amazing but my only gripe is that the story badly needed to be edited for it to be completely enjoyable.

Peanuts!

So this is what Lucy and Schroeder would be like if Charles Schulz had ever let them grow up? An interesting, imaginative take--Schroeder giving Lucy the pitch out again. You're probably right that Schroeder never would exchange his music for more attention to Lucy. I'm not sure that the guy's obsession with his music is really arrogance, though, or is the arrogance supposed to be covered by some other element of this story? Is this perhaps one of our UK writers attempting to come across as American? A good story line that could have benefited from an editor, many more commas, and a lot of trading of single quotes for double quotes. The move from present tense to past and back to present went smoothly. A good contest entry.

FAWC #2 Contributor

This story was written by MSTarot.