All Comments on 'Staying with Mrs. Wentworth, Day 02'

Is it wrong for me to hope they get married? Or at least have him knock her up :)

If I can offer some suggestions, you SHOULD consider what input your readers have, but in the end, YOU are the one writing the story. In this chapter, it seemed that in appeasing those requests to describe in greater detail the clothing the characters wear (which you indicated you had done), you allowed yourself to get slightly bogged down in places. It felt as though you were picking up speed and then "coasting" for a description before resuming the story. Does that make sense? Above all, your story should "flow". If something impedes that flow, you should either find a more creative way to incorporate that information, or edit it out.

Also, while filling in the details on what people wear, you might want to consider the actual people themselves. You introduced Julie to us, but how about a description of her? And how about a short explanation of "why" she's such a bitch. Is she the "queen bee" in school? The vain, busty, head cheerleader who is used to getting her way? Is she a skinny girl who wants to be curvier, or a thick girl who wishes she was thinner, and compensates for her own insecurities by being abrasive with others? If she's just someone you added to the story for this one chapter, you could still have fleshed out her character and motives with an extra sentence or two. And if she's going to appear elsewhere in the story, your readers would probably appreciate knowing a bit more about her. Even during the scene where Stephen is getting a handjob under the table, you wrote that she found an excuse to come over to the table to speak to him, but we didn't even get a summary of whatever she had to say.

Finally, The Woman, Mrs. Wentworth, aka Lana. Is she the cool, calm teacher? The submissive pet? The domineering authority figure? Her moods are all over the place, up to this point. Is THAT her personality? A succession of different roles and roleplaying, with a host of different personalities depending on the situation? Will we learn what prompted Stephen's mom to enlist her in keeping an eye on her son? Is there a hidden agenda shared between the two women? Maybe the former teacher and the mother have had an intimate relationship and are attempting to introduce the son into their activities?

I'm interested in reading more, but I'm MORE interested in reading YOUR story, without it being pulled in directions that are decided by the committee of your readers. You should write what pleases you. I suspect that would provide a smoother story, which I imagine I'd still enjoy even if that means ignoring all of MY suggestions, as well as others.

Your story is very erotic, the underwear descriptions and the spanking were very hot.

I hope this is going to be a long series.

Really enjoyed this, building nicely. Makes me want to meet the lady.

These two storys are soo well written, & lead us so well. I think there should be a 4&1/2star.l!!

I am enjoying the teasing, the discreptions, the whole weave of the story.

Going for #3 now.

Very erotic. She's getting him really 'revved-up' with jacking him off in public and then her spanking at home. I think I was right in my ch.1 assessment. She is going to seduce him IS seducing him. Is teaching him. And, I think, a little bit mental. But like a Fox. She might be a little disturbed but she's got a 19yr old permanent erection that is dying to please her and she's going to take advantage of it. Good Stuff!

Getting hot!

This is really getting good. Its true that Lana was REALLY naughty and needed a spanking, but Stevie needed some relief too. She kinda needs to let him know somehow when she is Mrs. Wentworth and when she becomes Lana and when she morphs back into Mrs. Wentworth. For example, Lana WAS naughty and did need the spanking, but when they got back to 'their' house she had become Mrs.Wentworth again and telling Stephen that she needed a spanking was confusing. I love spanking my women and I always pick women that are obviously going to do something to need a spanking for. And I always keep their panties and put each pair in a picture frame and hang it on my wall. I got a wall that has partial shelves where I keep trophys and little stuff and the rest of the wall I am filling up with framed panties. Always iron them and use acid free paper to back them and I type up a small sheet with her name, the date, where we were, and what we did to glue to the back and if possible a wallet size head shot of her and attach it to the back too. I've got white cotton granny panties, frilly french lace designer panties, thongs, g-strings, boy cuts. Some that are cotton with little hearts on them or stripes, and some that are crotchless. And almost all of them got a spanking. Go Mrs.Wentworth and Go Stevie. Let her treat you like you are twelve. I wish I'd had a woman in her 40's playing with my PeePee when I was 12! I'd have been scared to death, but WoW, I think I would have got into it pretty quick. Besides, all boys need an older woman to teach him what every boy needs to know.

It's getting really warm ;)

Other dude's right. She need to fugure out how to be letting him know when she Lana and when she mrs wentworth. He need to be spanking Lana but not mrs wentworth. She teachin him right and Lana being bad like. Anyway I wish too that I had a mrs wentworth when I was not twelve but when I was 18. Stuff would have been different. Better. I didn't no knothing and she didn't no knothing and so my first time and her first time wasn't all that great. Really it was pretty bad. I broke her and she cryed and I cum too fast and we didn't know what to do after that. A mrs wentworth could have made a difference. I think all guys nedd a Doris wentworth.

Yes this is very good. I can agree with some of your previous commentators that the Doris/Lana/Doris change could be confusing and especially for an 18 or 19yr old boy. I say boy - I suspect that Doris or Lana (one or the other) will soon guide him gracefully into manhood while being the gentleman all the way. I was fortunate to have a "Mrs. Wentworth" in my life early on and it was an education I was to never forget and useful for my whole life. Young men, or boys, need guidance in how to treat women and an older woman can help the young male to avoid the mind games that teen girls seem to play without even thinking. So, aside from some grammatical errors that could have been edited out, a very good story to this point.

Your first effort? Wow kudos kiddo! Love the reticence, the slow pacing,the awe of the first time and for the different voices you maintain for the older women in this story and the Preachers Wife. The interest in lingerie makes a pleasant change from the usual slobbering over body parts. Will read all of yours. Thanks

i wish there were more stories like that. about confident dominant old woman and obedient young boy.

Thoroughly enjoying this wonderful story!!! Happy to see that it is the beginning of a series! Thank you for sharing!

If I was Stephen I would have taken Mrs Wentworth's wet black panties to bed with me for some fun, but then I am just a naughty boy. Perhaps Mrs Wentworth will spank me for being so naughty?