Yes, I'm the Asshole

Good chuckle.

Well written. Nice change of pace for LW tales.

Loved the pacing

Lots of stories kind of stagger and sputter. Not yours.

If HDK can post his very

funny tales in LW, it is okay to post this sorta funny story in Humor & Satire.

Besides, the non-men living in LW nowadays have no sense of humor.

Or sex-lives.

Or genitals.

Ha Ha Ha

well done take on "he who laughs last laughs hardest."

Fine tale, thanks for posting

Well done, author!

Always enjoy a BTB tale with different twists.

'Sometimes Payback is a ' Cool Jerk'

She made him sell his grandad's guns in settlement ? Tsk, tsk ! If only conservative pundits were this funny. TTT did a great job in creating a character who does some borderline reprehensible actions, but couched in gritty humor - you just gotta recognize. *****

Great story!

Thanks for sharing.

THERE'S A HUGE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN

being an asshole supreme and a tyrant despot to only one, Non Sequitur. TK U MLJ LV NV

Not sure why this is in Humor intead of Loving Wives.

You way over did the "lol, I'm an asshole", and after running nearly a full story with him genuinely being the good guy being wronged, turned him into the real asshole that sleeps with other guys wives. I'm not talking about Sheri's lover - I'm talking about his shenanigans at Hedonism. When you become what you hate, and play this tearfully ironic spiel about how you got your revenge, it completely pisses away the goodwill of the reader to turn him into the kind of shithead the broke up his marriage in the first place.

I think hunmor is a good fit

Had me chuckling almost the entire time. Great story.

Sorry about the typo

I wish we could edit. Delete if the typo is too aggravating, please.

Humor vs. Satire

@Anonymous "Not sure why this is in humor..."

Sorry it's unclear to some... The category is Humor/Satire. While there are humorous elements to the story, it is meant as a SATIRE of many Loving Wives stories. I thought by the end that would be quite clear, but it appears I'm mistaken.

Just wanted to clear that up. Thanks for all the feedback.

Love the story!

The repetition of "I'm the asshole" reads like Rodney Dangerfield's "no respect". It highlights the satirical tone, and adds some humor. It's a fun read.

Well done

Only criticism I have is the rants about the divorce terms were a distraction from the steady string of good humor.
For all of that well done

I think it's a pretty good satire of Loving Wives

In fact, it would fit right in. It's truly great how Literotica gives wannabe writers an organized, well read, and free place to post erotica. Within all their categories, they have Loving Wives, even describing it as a place for "Married extra-marital fun: swinging, sharing & more", and all these bozos can do is criticize people who actually write stories about extra-marital fun, swinging and sharing. They applaud endless non-erotic misogynistic revenge fantasy. Personally I think it better qualifies as BDSM, because Sadism is Sadism, but the the lack of eroticism, or loving wives is striking. I'm guessing most have or had really bad marital issues. I'm also guessing I'd sympathize with any woman who found a man to escape their nasty attitudes, although I'd question any woman stupid enough to marry them in the first place.

Nice

Excellent satire. A nice break from life. I used to be an asshole. No more. Now I'm just a prick.

HA Ha ha

Wonderful

True satire. Thanks for taking the time to write this little tale. Goof for 5*.

Loved it! It was well written and extremely funny. There is an old saying that says that there is a lot of seriousness in jest. Translation: a joke is funniest when it is true. Jokes about dumb blondes don't work unless people know a dumb blonde or two. Stupid husband jokes or whore wife jokes aren't funny if there is a level of truth to them. This story was hilarious because it was so real. I could honestly see someone going through that and thinking like that.

My only issue with the story was that I HATED the wife. She cheated, but hey, everyone makes mistakes. Her biggest folly was that she was selfish enough to string another man along who was so in love with her that he overlooked her shit. Then she repays this man by leaving him at the altar. She was a bitch, and she should be left alone for a while. But other than that, great story. 5 stars!!!

Simple moral

You've been made deaf, dumb and blind by the pussy. You've let your family and friends bully you into taking her back. And you HAVE taken her back. You may not admit it to yourself, but it's clear as mud that you've knuckled under and accepted her back into your life. IDIOT! Lousy story about a man with NO balls.

Life is stranger than fiction

you gotta love comments from people that have never been on the life side of that equasion.

Perfection!

Funny as hell! Very true to some of us out here. More more more... *****

Very Good Read

Agree with others. Was a very funny story. Glad I ran across this one. Thanks.

other comments

Personally I think the writer did a great job on showing the inner crap that the cheated ON go through and then turn it to show humor throughout to get his point across. I liked the story for what it was a short funny romp through his character's reasoning.

10/10

Was humorous :)

One of the more useless, nonsensical crap that we find here imo.

Great story!

I really enjoyed this one. The ones that didn't mut be WIMPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Even better the 2nd time

I thoroughly enjoyed this tale. The BTB crowd cannot seem to step out of fantasyland long enough to face reality. He unofficially took her back. So what? It's their relationship, not ours. The inner dialog was BRILLIANT. The exchange with the "ex" as he finished documenting his story was the icing on the cake.

Real life does not fit into perfect little boxes that separate all of our emotions and relationships into neat categories. People are not perfect, and people are involved. There WILL be mess.

I like the way T3 pulled it all together.

Two thumbs up. Please keep writing.

Revenge story... sorta

The story was fantastic and I absolutely love the way Rick doesn't take s*** from anybody although the only part of the story I didn't get was the ending conversation "seventeen months, two weeks, three days since you fu**** that skank." 2 questions
1. Who is he talking to.
2. By skank do they mean Sheri? Or some random woman he met since he did say it was a year since he had been with any other woman.
Please will anybody tell me im soo confused. Please excuse my poor grammer if there was any.

Some people will just never get it.

I wouldn't have believed it was possible, but there are commenters who truly think this is one of their wish-fulfilment BTB stories, instead of a terrific mocking of those tunnel-vision exercises in self-indulgence.

It was like reading people commenting on Jonathan Swift's "A Modest Proposal" who were recommending barbeque sauces.

He gets years of unconditional repentance from the woman who he admits was the best he ever had, she gives him back all his money, leaves her devoted fiancee at the altar (after repeatedly telling him she loved someone else and would always go back to her ex-husband), gives him literally everything a woman can give a man, and some idiots applaud the dumb-ass for "sticking to his guns" (sort of) and continuing to reject her?

Pyrrhic victory. Look it up.

There should really be a sequel to this

This story much like you're other stories left me with a satisfying smile but I wanted to know a lot more like what gender is the baby or how is the ex's ex doing or even some earlier moments that go into detail like when he went on vacation what were all the things he did over there or what the others were doing, This is my favorite story published by you Tx Tall Tales I really hope to see a sequel if not well I'll just have to learn how to live with it.

Strange One

The only thing that really bugs me is she keeps saying "I love YOU," while she's letting her lawyers rape him in the divorce.

He's not an asshole!

I thoroughly enjoyed this tale. The RAAC crowd cannot seem to step out of fantasyland long enough to face reality. He divorced her and refused to remarry her. His resolve to stick to his principles and his explanations for doing so against an unrelenting, unified opposition was BRILLIANT. The exchange with the "ex" as he put an end to her next marriage, got his money back and used her as the slut she proved to be, when she thought he was going to remarry her was the icing on the cake!
The love between husband and wife is the sweetest gift from God we can experience in this world. Our wedding vows are not limits to our behavior as much as they are our guide to find that gift. It's a sad commentary on society that so few couples honor their vows enough to experience conjugal love; even worse, that Rick would be castigated for refusing to accept his wife making a mockery of his marriage.
T3, thank you for a tale that burns the bitch, honors marriage and makes a mockery of reconciliation at any cost!
Two thumbs up! Please keep writing.

My previous commit is a rebuttal to Sam37.

And yes, I did want to ridicule him.

IF A GUY BIDES HIS TIME AND THE STARS ALIGN

he may come out on top of the heap. TK U MLJ LV NV

a man who truely understands himself

his family on the other hand is confused and messed up.

IF THE END CONFUSES YOU...

please look at the genre.

Great story, well written twists kept me guessing where you were headed to till the end.

"Once at the end of May and again in April." Uh... huh?

If you have zero tolerance, which is a choice, clearly he was in the right... doesn't matter how sorry she is, she should likely have known.

And she's not brain dead - if she had REALLY not washed him to get screwed overt by the system, she could have stopped it. I don't think I like her a whole lot. She cheats on the man she says she loves with a guy she's not wild about; she does pretty much everything she can to crush the lover just because she can; she moves in with the lover though she loves her husband because, what, she'd rather have sex with the lover than get a job...?

Amazing that his family are such, oh, I don't know, "assholes"...? Granted, maybe (just maybe) what she did wasn't THAT bad... but to not blame her at all...? To make him the one who was completely in the wrong...? That's way wrong. I loved what he did and though he is with her, he still has the complete walk away potential.

After yet another read

I still thoroughly enjoyed this tale.

Do this many people really not get the concept of humor or fiction? Seriously? Did none of them read the author's name? Lol.

Tex, as always your story was well written and entertaining. It also kept enough reality to make it believable (as evidenced by the number of comments acting like it was nonfiction).

Bravo.

Truly

Awesome.

Awe...

I enjoy a good love story!

Roflmao

Enough said.

I hate cheaters

One of the better cheater stories but hate her

3 YEARS.....3 YEARS TO WAIT AND PLAN

and now its my turn to be home team,. TK U MLJ LV NV

Loved it!

Every word of it!

I like the sarcastic tone.

:)

Makes this satire so much more enjoyable. :)

Laughed at this

One of he best funny ones I've read well done

Why the low score?

I normally top pick the high scored stories when I'm going thru any author's submissions, but I've enjoyed so much of your work that I just read. This doesn't follow your normal theme, but I truly enjoyed it.

Thanx!

nope

dunno what to think .. read it n it makes sense but I just do not know what to think

I love satire

And this is also humorous. Nothing funny about cheating, but we can find humor in lots of situations.

Loved this!