All Comments on 'Writer's Fear'

I loved this story. You are a simply terrific writer. You give great imagery (sp?), I almost felt liket I was there. I'm not sure else how to describe it, but this is just a great story. I hope to read something else of yours!

I was blown away by the themes of loneliness and fear coupled with undeniable attraction. The mutual intimacy that was there from the beginning was just lovely. I would however point out that using character's names so consistently in a story where there are only really 2, causes it to be a little clunky at times. Simple 'He' and 'She' would create a flow that would increase it immensely. I loved the inner monologue of Sebastian, and its elegance and insightfulness makes me pretty sure that it reflects something very personal in you. Their verbal communication, particularly Kerry was a little more halting though, and I didn't get a very realistic sense of her speaking aloud. Her words were whole and unabbreviated which is unusual unless English is a second language. It just made her a little too formal and not very accessible.

All in all, I really enjoyed this and it resonated with me on several levels. Simply beautiful and a perfect ending - made more beautiful for its realism.

Thankyou Gatsby! :)

I really loved this story, and the depth of emotion behind it really gave you a sense of being there, of knowing them and how they feel. However, one minor point for future reference; I agree with icarustan, in that the language when they are speaking is very formal and clunky. If you used more abbreviations it would sound more natural and flow a lot better. Other than that I really loved this!