Having a daughter and choosing to leave her and continue being a fool while your parent picks up after you is grossly, unforgivably irresponsible.
I loved the story. You painted some very erotic pictures. I hope you tell us more. Some will say you should have an editor, but I rated you high anyway.
Ignore that last jackhole who called you irresponsible; you thought that college was out of the equation when you got pregnant, and your mother convinced you to proceed while she looked after her granddaughter. Most mothers wouldn't even consider doing that, but yours did. She was also right in encouraging you to explore your sexuality without another pregnancy, hence her then-cryptic remark about girls not being able to impregnate you.
I like how you were initially resistant to being watched masturbate and then you find out afterward that she'd watched you the whole time just as you had watched her. You also touched on a very basic truth: one need not be a lesbian to enjoy sex with another girl. I have always looked at that as simple economics. If you become pregnant while in college, you have to stop classes for an indeterminate number of weeks or months.
This was a good start to your writing experience; use this as a springboard for future fictional accounts. Well done.
I thoroughly enjoyed this story. Keep up the good work!
And if someone doesnt have the balls to identify themselves - leaving comments as anonymous - I dont think they are worth reading let alone paying any attention to.
Hope to see read from you in the future.
You have great potential as a storyteller and writer. Keep writing and don't worry about unthoughtful negative comments. But, do pay attention to the constructive comments you receive. I look forward to your next story. ChristieP
I don't know if people come back to read their comments but if they do I wanted to say thank you for the nice comments I got. It wasn't easy leaving my daughter behind while I went to college and my mom was so cool about watching her and insisting that I still have a college experience only this time without messing up and getting pregnant like I did in high school. I didn't just have sex in college but I had did have a lot of sex in college. I mean, I went to my classes, too, and I finished my degree and got a good job afterwards and even met my hubby while I was in college so it turned out to be a very good thing. Anyway, thank you and for the nice comments!
I hope there will be many more exciting parts to your story for me to enjoy.My wife,Joan, had the same thing happen in college with her room-mate Cindy.Cindy turned Joan on first with some nipples sucking & then moved down to show Joan how great it felt to be eaten and tongue fucked.In just after a week of pleasure she had Joan eating her pussy and to say Joan loved doing that w/b an understatement.Cindy would straddle Joan's face and cum in her mouth until she didn't have another drop of sweet pussy juice to feed Joan.As much as Cindy loved it Joan LOVED it more.Write more. LT
It's a great story and even better if true. Apart from a couple of typo/grammar errors it's excellent. I've added this to my 'Favorite Story' list.
This is really a very nice story. It reads like it's a true story and rather a surprising one. I hope you write more and that perhaps you make friends on this site. I hope Zoey and you became friends and you are still friends now. Your mom was smarter than a lot of moms and I'm glad she was so tolerant and let you find your way!
WOW that was amazing and so well written. You have talent I am placing you as a favourite author and story. Five stars wish there were six
One of the best FF stories I've ever read. Very descriptive, hot, and erotic.
Looking forward to reading more of your stories.
What a debut! You said this came from an actual experience and it read that way. You captured the intensity of the situation beautifully. Thanks, and please continue submitting stories.
That was just amazingly good girl. Pretty please write more about you and Zoey.
You've created both a very well written, as well as erotic, story. I look forward to reading the other installments.
You have a nice way of telling a story,
very detailed and lets the reader feel
as the characters do. Proofreading and
editing would make your storytelling
that much more polished.
Hope you know what your story caused me ! Thankyou & thank you & thank you !
Whew ! XXXs, Darla
Perhaps the sexiest story I have ever read!!! Very well written! I wish I was there to join in!!
Wow Katie, that was a great read, the imagery and the slight humour really made it ring true ('scuse the pun!).
I can't wait to read the rest of your work.
Thank you, so much
this was so exciting and erotic to read. love your writing style.. very fun to know how each of them feel, and how excited they got and could not stop mother nature.
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