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Zekthos' Bride

bytiawild©
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by Anonymous

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by Anonymous09/13/13

Good first submission.

I haven't read a story like this with a blob monster before, it was entertaining. Bonus: you can spell and write. I am going to offer a bit of unsolicited advice. You had three long paragraphs of Zekthos explaining the arrangement to Amber with only one action break where it losens it's hold on her. Adding more action, like it exploring her hair or adjusting the lighting, would have made those paragraphs less of a "speech" and given you a chance to add a bit more to your characters. Come back soon with another story.
Yves

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by Daddyslilpsycho09/13/13

really nice

Really hope you write more like this

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