Christmas Hero

liked it but

this was a very good idea for a story but it just seemed way too short and very rushed.

Lacks emotion

I like your stories, but always feel like I am getting the Cliff's Notes version. Quick hitters are fine, but I feel that you are shortchanging your ideas.

OK

I have to weigh in with the other comments. You had a good idea but presented it in much too short a story. You also have the timeline WAAAAAY wrong for the Medal of Honor. A year is fast for the paperwork and investigation of eligibility for this medal. The norm is nearer to two years. In any event you would never see this medal given out in just a month or two. I cannot believe Cassie's reaction to seeing Rick either. I can see him perhaps getting back with her after she saw the light but for her to immediately just dump Kyle and run to fall at Rick's feet in the ballroom? NAW, not agonna happen!

Great Idea

The idea for you story is great. I understand a little literary liscense, even with the CMH, but there is just so much more that you could have done. I have to agree with the peson who said you gave the "cliff note" version.

Same story once again

You've told this same basic story - wounded veteran comes home, girl doesn't understand, girl gets wise, vet and girl live happily ever after - often enough that now you're tired of it yourself and are hurrying through it. You're a good writer but you need a new angle.

almost forced...

Your details and timing are the only real problems here, as the other commentators have also indicated.

You have the kernel of a very good story here, but you overly Readers' Digest'd it.

This is a story that craves being drawn out slowly and carefully. Other authors of dime-store romances have made entire novels of lesser story lines than what you had your hands on here. This story line deserved greater respect and attention than you gave it here - both in terms of the gravity of the heroism and the honor &respect it deserves, as well as the twists and turns of a woman's heart. Neither subject should have been treated so abruptly here, and the rewards of such a story truly well told would be entirely self-evident.

I understand the impulse to rush, but this one should have been crafted carefully so the reader could saaavour it slowly and fully.

You wrapped that up too fast.

The groundwork was just barely laid for the story, and then it was over.

Short,and the same,,,

You seem to be stuck on the same plot,story after story,,,this one was just a bit shorter...if your getting bored with the story line,,,why dont you change it....its getting boring on this side too....

Constant theme

There seems to be a constant theme running through the comments. I must say I agree with them all. You have the kernel of a novel, but gave us an abbreviated short story, without fleshing it out.

Your grammar and spelling were very good, and your writing style not bad, other than rushing through it.

You need to do some research on the Marine Corps, and the military in general. First of all, a Marine never salutes in doors unless he is under arms. The MOH takes way longer to filter through the system, and then it NEVER is given in secret. Ramstein Air Base is one of the most highly guarded bases we have. I don't think they are all that worried about terrorists. Yes, they are a threat, but not much. No President would miss out on all the publicity and good press that comes with awarding our highest honor for exceptional service.

Please take these comments as constructive criticism and continue writing. You have obvious ability, but seem to lack the patience needed to hone your craft.

JC

Another rushed version of basically the SAME story! Your grammar, punctuation and spelling suck! Spell check doesn't do all that much.

NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS

there will always be detractors and means to accomplish. TK U MLJ LV NV

YOU SHOULD CHECK MORE INTO

THE PROCESSES OF THE MILITARY PROCESSES AND THE TIMES IT TAKES FOR VARIOUS AWARDS THE MEDAL OF HONOR HAS NEVER BEEN PROCESSED THAT QUICKLY

Good Read*****

Thanks for sharing. I like your style!!!

Really????

Sure girl I aint seen ya in years, and you thought I was some kind of massive coward because some gigalo jackass said so.... fuck off bitch.

2/5

Should be better

I have read your other stories and i liked them. This is a Nice plot but it is way too short. Too bad. Thanks for your stories!

BEEEP!

THIS IS A RECORDING.

Same old, same old.

Liked Your Story

A little short but a good story none the less.

very good, but.......................

very good, but i don't understand all the negative coments!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i've read all of your stories, and those of others who have the military in mind! and for the life of me, i cannot understand their bad comments! i'm an army veteran, had uncles in the navy, and support the wounded warriors program! hey, we are are mortals, and sometimes, more often than not make mistakes! is that all the readers are here for, is to find fault???????????????? give me a break!

Misses the mark

Cassie makes up her mind that Rick was a coward and takes up with Kyle but as soon as Kyle looks to be in the shit she dumps him and tries to latch onto Rick again and Rick allows it?
Too far fetched for it to be believable

when i was fighting for this country and wounded

it wasn't right or left blood that i lost,it was american blood.we all are american.

Good Story

But it was too short. You definately should have continued in detail with the fallout for the Beekmans and especially, Kyle. Like; what were his sources, what was the secret military information that put men's lives in danger, why did he do it? I suspect he wanted Cassie but you should have gone in to more detail how he got her to abandon her high regards and love for Rick. Maybe even from her POV to explain what she was thinking. Then having Rick just take her back so fast knowing that she was so quick to betray him and think the worst. I imagine she's been in a "close" relationship with Kyle. It started out good but then you just stopped. This story is in the Romance category but you skipped everything that had to do with romance. This story had a lot of potential but you dropped the ball. It wasn't even very Christmassy. Maybe you can come out with "the Aftermath" or FinishTheDamnStory will.

What's not to understand about the negative comments? I can forgive the story developing too quickly, but this Cassie person, what kind of nitwit is she? She dumps Rick first, then she drops Kyle like a hot potatoe when things become too complicated for him, and Rick is not even a bit uncertain about what type of woman she is and takes her back on a few totally inadequate words of remorse? Even her own father is disappointed in her. That definitely needed more time before a reconciliation could happen. If a reconciliation should have happened at all.

well

Love all your stories. This one I think did need more fleshing out. Or at least him shunning the girl that came back to him. How she acted was, well reflective of a girl he is better off without. They dated and she knew him so poorly she believed this of him? No probable just another cheating woman.

Great

May all leaders have the honor shown in your stories. But in the real world even the Commandant of the Marines office refuses to obey their OATH!!!

agree with others

Cassie needs more than a skip and go prancing reward for her dishonor

where is the romance??

No romance here, the only interaction between them is her falling at his feet and giving a poor apology.

A Medal of Honor recipient so quick to forgive and even reward dishonor against him?
The man is a Marine do you really believe he would so quickly forgive and forget she was sleeping with HIS enemy?

It doesn't really deserve a whole star.

Good story

Story is good needs another chapter

Good story add to it

Good story until the abbreviated ending

Entertaining until you drove this off the cliff at the end. Which really wasn't an ending. Does he really forgive Cassie? Why would he? She's utterly and totally betrayed him. I don't think a Marine forgets or forgives that level of betrayal. So that, all by itself, ruined the ending. And what happened with the Beekmans and the lawsuit? This needed more at the beginning to really explain his relationship with Cassie and the Town in general. And much, much more was needed at the ending. I gave you a 2 because I enjoyed this until the very end and then it went to hell in a hand basket.

Hoorah!

Semper Fi! Understand?

Eyuuch!

I am not one to decry heroes or the military but this is sacherine, over-simplistic, sentimental mawkish drivel !

stupid, purely stupid

Semper fidelis is a Latin phrase that means "always faithful" or "always loyal".
In the United States it is best known as the motto of the United States Marine Corps.

With that in mind does it seem likely that a Marine, a decorated veteran would instantly and casually forgive someone for betraying him?
For being extremely disloyal to him?
And to top that off showing disrespect to not only the Marine Corps, but the US as well?

Don't know why

This author can write entertaining stories, but for some reason almost always gets in a big rush at the end to finish the story. It is unsettling and tends to make the reader feel they have been cheated by having a significant part of the story left out. It reads like a book that has had a few pages torn out of it.

LOVED IT 5 Stars!!!

Eat shit annony!! bonnie is right you are the asshole of LIT!!

NEEDS TO BE RETOLD IN A SEQUEL

I love all your stories but this needs a sequel to explain the whole story. Don't worry it's great "BUT"... Love you all! Bye. Greg. Oh 9stars OH! You have done this recently in your latest story. BYE.

Very nice short one

BUT any girl that gives up that easily is a cheater and extremely likely to do again at some point. The only thing I can see here is a loving wives story of a cheater, sorry.

Odd

So she knew him well.
She believed the lies, or an excuse to cheat?
Why would he want her?
This needs a sequel to address their relationship else the story just feels half done.
Very fine writing.

a little short but I liked it.

I would love for a lying p.o.s to get into a confrontation with a certain marine captain.

I'm not so sure

Cassie baby was probably getting her cunt drilled by kyle, so why take the skank back???

Good story BUT

I liked the story except for two things. First, it was way too short and second is cassie. He should have never taken her back, NEVER.

THIS STORY SHOULD BE IN LOVING WIVES

Oh Rick I am sorry I'm getting my pussie destroyed by Karls big cock! But if I can Bullshit and beg you to take me back I promise to Fuck all big bull cocked men while you are not around, let's just say what you don't know won't hurt you. Oh please Rick take me back Kyle is going to be a bitch to a big bad Dude in the Big House. And I want your Prestige and your money You can keep your dick Im going to get me some big cock! What do you say Rick PLEEEEEEEEEZE I LOVED EVERY ONE OF YOUR STORIES GATOR RICK. Thanks GREG OH 100 % OF READING ENJOYMENT BYE.

Sorry no

If he takes Cassie back as this story implies at the end than he is a moron and I don't give stories with willfully stupid characters anything but a 1. Sorry I won't support this. I did not enjoy this and the author has this hero lined up for more heartache. Fuck that.

Military courtesy

I won't nitpick about Cassie - forgiveness is a characteristic of love, not logic and this is a fantasy. I will nitpick about customers of the service though. Please do the research. The naval service (of which the USMC is part) does not wear headgear indoors, and does not salute while uncovered indoors, unless they are "under arms".

AFTER GOING THROUGH A LIFE ALTERING SITATION

the brain and heart returns to what it was before; TK U MLJ LV NV