Reality check

This is heart wrenching, I'm left speechless I'm afraid.

Fived

and with no nitpicks either! :-)

Tod , sorry for the delayed comment

I liked this in the challenge thread : i like it here too . Wish such vicious things did'nt happen to you or to any abused kid : but you overcame misery & have metamorphed into a successful entrepreneur / poet ! Congrats , Tod more power to you :5- ed .

My first impression was you said it all in the first 3 stanzas and could have ended there. However, the dramatic repetition of the two lines at the end of the poem brought me back into the mind of of a young boy going over and over a desperate situation, trying to solve a problem he can not solve, so the 4th and 5th stanzas that extended the Narnia narrative as an escape worked well after all. Excellent poem, tod.

Thanks for the comments

Ash don't stress mate, we all have lives, all we can do is comment on what we "get" when we see it. as always your comments and everyone else's are appreciated.

No nitpick Angeline.... are you feeling well? :-p

thank you Greenmountaineer, I was hoping that that repetition would cause a final punch of helplessness.

This hit home with me more than any poem I've read on lit. Thank you for sharing it. The feelings it evoked in me made me feel like you'd seen my childhood and took me right back there.

to theoncomingstorm

I read one of your poems that did the same for me, I'm sure I commented on it also. Thanks for taking the time to comment.,