Good start. Hope more to come. Sister -Sister action maybe later?
by
Anonymous11/03/13
Sorry but ....
... you really need to proof read!
A couple of times errors changed the complete sense of a sentence!
Example - "As the bottoms hit the floor I admired her round firm behind and could help but to reach up ..." - 'couldn't help'??
The plot is as old as the hills The shy virgin gives it up with amazing rapidity The guy is tempted but doesn't take the slightest precaution, i.e., procure some condoms
by
Anonymous11/03/13
Ignore the Morons
The plot is fine. Too bad HH (His Higness?) is so jaded. Looking for elevated sophistication on a porn site, eh? Sweeeet.
And the grammar/punctuation police? Irregardless of their hypocrisy they misunderestimate you.
Thank you, ITDan3, for writing this and sharing it with us and welcome to Literotica. I hope you will continue to write for us and I can tell you that your work will only get better, so try to ignore the 'downers'.
It's often quite surprising how quickly and enthusiastically a newcomer adopts new practices - especially sex!
Your story was far from perfect but it was a good and welcome start - well done!
by
Anonymous11/04/13
Rubbish
Your jest a fucking wanker
by
Anonymous11/04/13
Good!
I really liked this story, keep your word on it and I'll definitely read part 2!
I'm shocked! Don't worry about the complainers. I'm here for enjoyable stories, not great literature - and this one is a *very* enjoyable story even if it's been done before. Looking forward to reading more adventures with the sister-in-law.
by
Anonymous11/07/13
Great Story
Please keep writing, SILs are my absolute favorite.
English
More more
Very good hope for more
Great! MORE MORE
Good start. Hope more to come. Sister -Sister action maybe later?
Sorry but ....
... you really need to proof read!
A couple of times errors changed the complete sense of a sentence!
Example - "As the bottoms hit the floor I admired her round firm behind and could help but to reach up ..." - 'couldn't help'??
Weak
The plot is as old as the hills The shy virgin gives it up with amazing rapidity The guy is tempted but doesn't take the slightest precaution, i.e., procure some condoms
Ignore the Morons
The plot is fine. Too bad HH (His Higness?) is so jaded. Looking for elevated sophistication on a porn site, eh? Sweeeet.
And the grammar/punctuation police? Irregardless of their hypocrisy they misunderestimate you.
Not bad at all!
Thank you, ITDan3, for writing this and sharing it with us and welcome to Literotica. I hope you will continue to write for us and I can tell you that your work will only get better, so try to ignore the 'downers'.
It's often quite surprising how quickly and enthusiastically a newcomer adopts new practices - especially sex!
Your story was far from perfect but it was a good and welcome start - well done!
Rubbish
Your jest a fucking wanker
Good!
I really liked this story, keep your word on it and I'll definitely read part 2!
what, a plot that's been used before?
I'm shocked! Don't worry about the complainers. I'm here for enjoyable stories, not great literature - and this one is a *very* enjoyable story even if it's been done before. Looking forward to reading more adventures with the sister-in-law.
Great Story
Please keep writing, SILs are my absolute favorite.
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