Ask Me Again In Twenty Years

Redheads

Damn, you write so well. Thanks
Jack

Category

I believe that you are correct this is indeed your category.

I love your works. You are one of my favorite authors.

Okay,

Lived it per usual, BUT WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO FINISH:

Finding an Editor!!!!!!


That is the question.

Well written, enjoyable five star story, just the right length!

Wonderful writer has composed a very enjoyable story, that could have actually happened in real life. Admittedly the characters move through things quickly and sometimes a bit unreal. I really enjoyed this entry and will be reading more from this fine author-keep them coming!

I think I know what your problem is

You write in reverse.

Seriously, your stories essentially end with a once-wronged man who has risen from the ashes, all head and shoulders above the bitch who wronged him. You work backward from there to the cheating, and then front-load the details.

The cheating is just sort of a black box, a Heisenberg compensator, and is NEVER adequately explained. It's just deus ex machina, and it's unsatisfying.

You're right about one thing: this was a romance, and many of the best LW stories are both cheating stories which end with romance.

Get a fucking editor.

top five writers on this site

great writing.

Yep. You are good at Romance

No problem for me. My favorite category.
Good story.
So. When ARE you going to finish "Looking for an Editor"?
Anonymous Andy

Nice Feel Good Romance

If it had put in LW it would have caught a lot more flack but here the commentaries are but back ground music. I really was curious what she could have possibly said in order to explain what she did... She fell in love with another guy and for got all he had represented in her life.

I liked it

Looking forward to Finding an Editor Ch. 3

Nice!

Thanks for sharing.

When I read a story about someone who's been cheated on, I usually end up getting bored with the cheating details.

It seems pretty much formulaic. Someone's significant Other cheats on them, and they want to write a story in which they can record every detail. Every monotonous detail. Everything they think is significant (and NOTHING is IN-significant, as far as they're concerned).

I still got the impression that this wasn't a complete work of fiction. I still got a strong impression that your significant Other cheated on you, with a black guy, and kept on seeing him after ASSURING you they were done. I got a really, really strong impression that you were writing this story from the point of view that it had a strong basis in fact.

So, either you managed to make the formula work, for you, when so many others just end up sounding whiny and boring, OR, you're a brilliant writer who was able to convince a skeptic that you were the patsy of a cheater, when in fact you were not.

Either way, nice story.

Math

If Sarah was 8 years older and he was five years older than El, then Sarah was 13 when El was born. Or did I miss something. Normally your work is just suburb and quite interesting. I became stuck on this issue in this story.

Another Q story - put a big smile on my face tonight

Excellent and interesting romantic story. Strange the daughter would do what she did, but it worked out OK for everybody eventually.

Dude

I think you could write a bondage (not my most favorite thing on earth) story and I would still love it. 5 Stars as always.

Another fine story

I've enjoyed pretty much all of your work and again you didn't let me down. Yours is one of the few names I watch for on the New stories page. Thanks for the entertainment.

Great Read*****

Thanks for sharing this very entertaining story.

20 YEARS

for some a lifetime, for others a mirage of events, TK U MLJ LV NV

Another great story

I enjoyed reading your story. Thank you for sharing.

Thank you for another wonderful submission.

Excellent once again

I could not fault the story. (Except, maybe, for the ages of Sarah and Else.)

don't give up

Your other threads are great and need to be addressed

Well done, well written love story

My only question was how or why they didn't look for Elsa when she left. I would have thought, as a man, he would have wanted to get some questions answered and make sure he wanted to divorce her. As her Mother Sarah would have wanted to know where her child was and if she was safe. Other than those two minor questions, it was a good read.

And you sure can write Romance!

Always Top Drawer writing

No Growth

Your writing shows essentially no growth despite the category. The style is simplistic and unimaginative. Your plots are best described as "Confederate Fantasy"; black women crave the white male protagonist and black men are sex-starved for white women and ultimately irresponsible. Try to improve.

First story of yours that I read

I'll let you know if you should just stick to this genre. But this was very good.

good work

I can see you have put thought into the plot. Admittedly there might be holes that make things look a little illogical at times, but how can people be so negative? You didn't charge them a dime and they can close the browser if they don't like it,

Keep up the good work.

Well, I guess it's worth 5 *.

But for my simple brain it was confusing, Kind of like having double cousin's, you know were two brother's marry two sister's. Try to explaine that after you're drunk. "Yah, this is my Mom, but she's also my second cousin, or my Aunt, or Hell, I just don't fucking know.

Nicely done -

He made out in the end - we do have the unanswered questions about what the fuck happened to Else - likely she was too young to be married to him in the first place and the hormones gave way to curiosity which gave way to stupidity and bad judgement -

It did seem like she never did quite get it though so she never did understand what her mother did or why??

I would have liked

To get an explanation of why Elsa had the affair. Did she not love him, how did she meet her lover was it as basic as she had to have a bigger guy?

But again loved your story . Yes, I agree romance is your thing!

Another BBD story...

4 was as high as I could get.

Don't stop now..

...if the want to turn into romances - let them. We all need some romance in our lives, and in our reading.

whore

Frankly, she deserved more pain.....your story though.

Romance IS your category.

I really enjoyed this one. Good believable characters; Easy suspension of disbelief; AND a happy ending. Who could want more?

Family!

After a recent family tragedy, I have tears running down my face as I read about the love and care of family in your closing paragraphs!

thanks

Marvelous

Marvelous story, really perfect for when I'm in the mood for that perfect cheated on but got the best revenge tale.

Great Story

Everything I've come to expect from your writing. Thank you

And what's wrong with Romance and a happy ending? I bet there aren't many who can't do with a little more happiness in their lives.
Thank you and keep up the good work.

Well... I will say its great...

Not only ur story but also that u will be writing for romance section only. I will keep on checking for all ur new stories as I prefer romance section. I dont like to run in other categories half as much. Sometimes sci fi has got good ones but romance section is best for me. Even if no sex.. just the love part makes me keep on reading :)
Thanks for a great story :)

i'm 43 years old , in fairly good shape ...
fuck me , i have trouble breathing sometimes when i read this Author's stories.

xxxhugsxxx

TwistedOliver.

My favorite...

...that you've written actually. Was fast paced with very little in the way of "Sexy Time", but the tale you told was lovely none the less.

Really really good, but way too fast, like trying to race a bullet train

Why?

I'd like some explanation for why she went back to her lover after being so broken up when he was first exposed.

Just so

you don't give up writing altogether. We would miss you. Another great one, BTW.

I WONDER IF THEY WILL OUT LIVE

and go for 50=60 etc...TK U MLJ LV NV

GOOD STORY

REALLY GOOD STORY IN MY FAVORITES. ELSA CHEATS BUT WHY NO REASON GIVEN. SARAH MARRIED A LOVING MAN AND SHE LOVED HIM.
I KNOW SARAH AND HER HUSBAND ARE TO OLD FOR A SEQUEL BUT WHAT ABOUT ELSA.

RON TEXAS COWBOYRIDECC@YAHOO.COM

Q, I liked the story, but as others have commented, I'd have liked to know why El cheated. Did she like black cock? Bigger cock? Did she want a younger guy? Wasn't she getting enough at home?

Yes

I agree, you do good romance romance.