I think there could be more build up after the intro but some people are abrupt. Great start to any number of scenarios. Keep writing.
This is a great start. I'm sure there will be a part 2?
That is the best I can give this. A story of this type told from the pov of the other person is, by default, told from the perspective of the one with the least at risk. As a result the tension just is not there.
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English
abrupt but sexy,,,
I think there could be more build up after the intro but some people are abrupt. Great start to any number of scenarios. Keep writing.
Interesting
This is a great start. I'm sure there will be a part 2?
3*'s
That is the best I can give this. A story of this type told from the pov of the other person is, by default, told from the perspective of the one with the least at risk. As a result the tension just is not there.
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to New Friends or
More submissions by GemimaCav.