by lovewords
I think this story has a lot of potential to be really fun and sweet. But I personally am getting so confused with who's with who and who's who. The women seem like all one person. Lol they have the same tastes in clothes and (I know it's only the first chapter) but the same personality too. So I hope with the next chapter you can make everyone very distinguishable through their character and traits etc. I can't wait to see where you'll take this.
It seems like a lot going on just in the first chapter. The girls definitely seem all cut from the same cookie mold. The guys have a bit of a personality difference between them. I think I will get the girls confused if there isn't more differences amongst them. It's still early yet so I will wait and see.
Hopefully Takeshi will just walk away so Morgan can see The Man With The Iron Fists. Let those fools look ignorant by themselves. I know it will be hard for him to back away and it doesn't mean he is a pussy for ignoring their remarks.
It was just gettin interesting. Hopefully there will be chapters. Is all 4 couples the main characters? I wonder if one of males will hav iron fist or all. I'm just trying to figure out where title fit into storyline? Hmm.
What was this? It's barely more than the beginning of an idea. Next time, rather than posting it so early, hold onto your writing until it's ready to present a story, not just the idea of one.
I’m excited to see where this story can go, but you left us on an extreme cliffhanger please finish the story!