All Comments on 'A Shewolf Takes a New Mate'

There isn't any critique I have to offer

The story was very well written and I look forward to more of your work. I have bookmarked only one other author, but now I will add another to my list.

This story was engaging, nicely structured and narrated, except for a few typos and some nearly laughable word substitutions. There were several run-on sentences and a few incidences of awkwardly added participles that needed a comma or two to improve the reading, quite frequent in Literotica stories.

Listing a few specific errors:

Pulling on her hair he growled with Farrell (sic) feral hunger for his 'new mate' as she had said it.

The room quickly started to become perforated (sic) permeated with the smell of their growing sex …

… and that made his heart melt for her every time he thrusted (sic) thrust into here that much more.

He was starting to push her past her usual limits and she started to breath (sic) breathe fast as her heart started racing in her soft chest.

Mallory started to panted (sic) pant and moaned (sic) moan badly with every thrust that he ripped into her and …

She held onto him tightly and whispered into his ear weakly, "lay (sic) lie down for me my lover, …

Bobby didn't know what to say so he just stayed quite (sic) quiet but he did feel his love grow for her even more as she said these words and new (sic) now there wasn't a thing that he wouldn't do for her to keep her happy.

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Some more proof-reading and the error-flagging in M$ Word could help in some cases, but vocabulary errors are tougher to counter, without more intensive reading experience.

We look forward to the next chapter. Good luck!

I'm happy to be received so well here, I thank all of you for all your support. I'm open to new ideas so if anyone has a story they wished they could have always read I would probably write it for them. As for the run on sentences and what not, I do happen to be an avid reader and writer but I also happen to be dyslexic just for the records unfortunately enough. Working on my third story just now, I promise not to disappoint! ;)

I will be checking back every so often, great story and plot. You have got me hooked.

Nice story, agree with the strange word substitutions though. Also you mention the name of the town way too many times. Is it Rain Fall or Rainfall Hills ? Otherwise, enjoyed it.

Be honest though people, what would you like to see? I am open to suggestion here.

I love this!! Onward to part 2.

A penis won't ever hit ovaries. Broke the story for me. Liked it other than that.

Mistakes in spelling and odd word usage can break the spell and fantasy of a reader. For example. You meant to use the word ..feral. Meaning wild or animal in nature. You instead used Farrell with a capitalized F. That was very odd.

I liked it.

Looking forward to the next part.

Story concept was great, but the redundant and/or trite phrases, and numerous typos made it difficult to read. The last straw was when Bobby was poking Malory "in the ovaries". Really? Cervix maybe... I suggest you accept the help of one of Literotica's volunteer editor's and make this story shine like it should.