I think I'd have enjoyed it more with a longer, more gradual rise in tension, for me there isn't quite enough time or teasing between the first touch and full-on masturbation. But that's just me.
Also, the first few paragraphs are a little clumsy with certain words repeated unnecessarily, which nearly stopped me from continuing, and that would've been my loss because this is a really good beginning and you can clearly write well.
English
Made me cum...
I love mutual masturbation stories, and photographs, the whole subject...
I like it.
I think I'd have enjoyed it more with a longer, more gradual rise in tension, for me there isn't quite enough time or teasing between the first touch and full-on masturbation. But that's just me.
Also, the first few paragraphs are a little clumsy with certain words repeated unnecessarily, which nearly stopped me from continuing, and that would've been my loss because this is a really good beginning and you can clearly write well.
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