Perhaps a bit more tension before sex, perhaps a accidental touching while looking through the telescope? But I enjoyed it. Thanks
good story you did I like it alot I hope you do more of this story
This was a good story that deserves a sequel, or at least tell what happened afterwords. It was unprotected sex afterall.
Really loved your story. Thanks for sharing a fine talent.
This was nothing short of amazing how about more chapters
Good story, but I was distracted by the run on sentences and grammar. Just something to keep in mind for the next one. Look forward to it! :)
Hot really hot !
once again this idiot leaves a story unfinished what a waste of time this needs to be deleted and the idiot banned.
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English
What of the future?
Perhaps a bit more tension before sex, perhaps a accidental touching while looking through the telescope? But I enjoyed it. Thanks
great story
good story you did I like it alot I hope you do more of this story
Sequel
This was a good story that deserves a sequel, or at least tell what happened afterwords. It was unprotected sex afterall.
Good Tale
Really loved your story. Thanks for sharing a fine talent.
Good Tale
Really loved your story. Thanks for sharing a fine talent.
Chapter 2?
This was nothing short of amazing how about more chapters
hey
Good story, but I was distracted by the run on sentences and grammar. Just something to keep in mind for the next one. Look forward to it! :)
Hot
Hot really hot !
UNFINISHED AS USUAL
once again this idiot leaves a story unfinished what a waste of time this needs to be deleted and the idiot banned.
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to Carried Away or
More submissions by scorpio00155.