by Hypoxia
I found this to be extremely bizarre and not one bit erotic. Who wants to read about 2 banana slugs getting it on. Also the kids are 13 and 15 when they are struck by lightning, which makes them underage and is against the rules.
As the participants of the sex are not human, this really should not be categorized as incest but instead be in the non-human category in my opinion. Sorry but, I will be sure not to read any further stories by you as this is just not what I come to literotica for.
The point of the story is the O.Henry ending, not the gastropod sex, which I noted in the preface. No underage humans have sex here. I had intended this to be in the non-Human category, but that's for sexual interactions between humans and others, which doesn't happen here. And no, this isn't a stroker. I tend to write challenging tales as well as pandering pleasantries. You might find THAT'S MY GIRL more to your taste. Enjoy!
This might be a good story. I wouldn't know, I stopped reading because the first few paragraphs are so chock full of blatant stereotypical nonsense. Im not normally very nationalistic and to be fair I understand why some folks are not exactly pro-American. I gotta say though it doesn't show any kind of intellect nor is it very entertaining to simply spend time insulting one group or another. Good luck with your future writings.
I wasn't sure what to expect, but I can tell you I was thoroughly entertained. The banana slug sex was strange, but it's the sorry of thing you'd only be able to read on an adult fiction site, so there we go. Maybe a warning at the top, "This is only sexy if you ate into mollusc beastiality." Lol
As an aside, I just moved a banana slug out of a frequently walked on trail just north of Muir woods yesterday, lol.
Like a incestuous Metamorphosis. I'll vote on this one after scratching my head some more.
This should be in SF-Fantasy or Nonhuman or something like that. Funny story -- funny-weird, not funny-ha-ha, except the bit about being eaten. Very subtle.
as a writer you SUCK. delete and stop posting until you learn how to write and use the proper catagories PROPERLY.
called him garbage and asshole the day she saw him. HIs wife called him cuck the day after they married. And everyone on here calls him fag!!!!
You just took a massive strap on to this readership's sensitive orafice. And why not, eh? There have been stranger things written on acid. You do your forefathers of the 60s proud!
Everyone needs to stop insulting others you are just writing a story
The broken English makes this story unbearable. Spend less time bashing Americans and more time learning English.
I warned of word effects because Anglish is not the narrator's a first language. I warned of irony because this is a tragi-comedy, not a stroker. BTW much of this really happened. Stop in at Club Forestville and ask.
Reading some of the other comments, I notice that the cultural critic has hit home.
Personally I enjoyed the story very much.