Are you kidding? Dan gets to go to jail courtesy of the SEC now, then? For securities fraud, insider trading...oh boy the list goes on. Before you write about something like this, ask a lawyer that specializes in corporate law, or do some research. Broke immersion totally. I like a bit of brain in my porn, sorry. Noble Truth can do it. So can you. I admittedly only skimmed ch2, but I wanted to know if it would be worth going back and perusing rather than skimming. Alas, I find that isn't the case. I'll look at your other offerings though, because your command of the adjective and adverb are worth at least a second chance, and likely more than that. I'm referring to the sex scenes, of course. If the sections between bouts of sex were of similar caliber, this would be a damn fine tale. Perhaps another of your works...
PS: yes, I am a nerdy snob that gets a kick out of a good story coupled to hot sex. What of it?
-Anubelore :)
very nice not over-writen. Both main characters are not exaggeratedly overburden with artifial un-believable guilt trips. a lot of other writers transform what could have been an interesting story into a story that you can barely tolerate and read in spite of the main character annoying constant hesitation.
English
Orgasmically beautiful
Amazing & wonderful story has all the makings of a good book. Aroused me to the point of where i must see more.
just loved it soooo
I really loved all of the parts of this story. Your very good with the detail. There has to be more. Can not get enough. wow good stuff
confiscating your stocks?
Are you kidding? Dan gets to go to jail courtesy of the SEC now, then? For securities fraud, insider trading...oh boy the list goes on. Before you write about something like this, ask a lawyer that specializes in corporate law, or do some research. Broke immersion totally. I like a bit of brain in my porn, sorry. Noble Truth can do it. So can you. I admittedly only skimmed ch2, but I wanted to know if it would be worth going back and perusing rather than skimming. Alas, I find that isn't the case. I'll look at your other offerings though, because your command of the adjective and adverb are worth at least a second chance, and likely more than that. I'm referring to the sex scenes, of course. If the sections between bouts of sex were of similar caliber, this would be a damn fine tale. Perhaps another of your works...
PS: yes, I am a nerdy snob that gets a kick out of a good story coupled to hot sex. What of it?
-Anubelore :)
Nice and to the point.
very nice not over-writen. Both main characters are not exaggeratedly overburden with artifial un-believable guilt trips. a lot of other writers transform what could have been an interesting story into a story that you can barely tolerate and read in spite of the main character annoying constant hesitation.
What happens next?
we really do want to read what happens after this. Babies, weddings, Mother in law.
Yummy II
Love it, please add more to it :D
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