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Great
The story held my interest and made me want to read more ...... hope more follows real soon ,,,,,,,
So vivid
I really love your descriptive writing. It wasn't just "like being there," there were also a few shocks of recognition. Your phrase "the new, hard silence" had me in goosebumps. What a perfect description.
I'll stop gushing now, but wow. The mystery of what is going on has me on the edge of my seat. Please post more, and soon!
"I need more."
"There has got to be more."
Hi, I really enjoyed that, even though it wasn't what I'd consider arousing, it was well written and I enjoyed your style. Seeing as how you've got a few novels under your belt, I can see why, you are a veteran.
My only major complaint is that the aside about the horror movie music was unnecessary and took me out of what was supposed to be a tense scene. I suppose it was there to be a self-referential comment on that particular trope in an effort to seem more self-aware and less cheesy, but in my opinion it did the opposite. Pointing out the tropey-ness of it instantly sucked out the tension.
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