This is way too well constructed and with too much continuity to be written in one or two page installments at a time. So you have to have more all ready to go! This last one really left me wanting more. So MORE, please!
What I mean is that your grammar and usage are impeccable. Maybe I'm too picky, but I expect even amateur authors to compose sentences that aren't so garbled that they make my teeth itch. There are some stories that, regardless of their merit, I just can't read.
I'm very happy that yours are not among them.
by
Anonymous06/14/14
Nice story
If a story is well written, has good characters with background and an interesting story line, then I don't need sex in it. I like your story and look every day for the next chapter.
Please don't apologize for the pacing or lack of sex in the story. The encounter with Randi was literotica at its best; you under estimate your skill. I too am looking forward to future installments. You write well and this is a good theme.
by
Anonymous06/17/14
A good story but...
I tend to agree with the comments about spicing it up a bit, at least for this category. one or two chapters light on the sex would be tolerable, but ten chapters with minimal sex should almost have been put in Non-Erotic considering the very nature of this site.
Having said that the story line is good, just not filled in enough for this site.
by
Anonymous01/29/15
Agreed.
I've read some very good story's that are so easy to read, and are interesting in the normal sort of way. Then the author jams in some rub and tug material, kind of feels forced and I don't care for forced sex. Keep doing what your doing. If you what to wright sex for sex a different story line would be a good break.
OH this is one ofthe good stories.
English
Great story
I love this tale. Please keep the chapters coming.
TKU
Just more please?
Never mind the folks frustrated at the lack of sex, this is a really good story and I can't help but hope it ends well for them. It's sweet.
Great story
Title of comment says it all
Interesting Presentation
This is way too well constructed and with too much continuity to be written in one or two page installments at a time. So you have to have more all ready to go! This last one really left me wanting more. So MORE, please!
Well edited
What I mean is that your grammar and usage are impeccable. Maybe I'm too picky, but I expect even amateur authors to compose sentences that aren't so garbled that they make my teeth itch. There are some stories that, regardless of their merit, I just can't read.
I'm very happy that yours are not among them.
Nice story
If a story is well written, has good characters with background and an interesting story line, then I don't need sex in it. I like your story and look every day for the next chapter.
I love the pace
Please don't apologize for the pacing or lack of sex in the story. The encounter with Randi was literotica at its best; you under estimate your skill. I too am looking forward to future installments. You write well and this is a good theme.
A good story but...
I tend to agree with the comments about spicing it up a bit, at least for this category. one or two chapters light on the sex would be tolerable, but ten chapters with minimal sex should almost have been put in Non-Erotic considering the very nature of this site.
Having said that the story line is good, just not filled in enough for this site.
Agreed.
I've read some very good story's that are so easy to read, and are interesting in the normal sort of way. Then the author jams in some rub and tug material, kind of feels forced and I don't care for forced sex. Keep doing what your doing. If you what to wright sex for sex a different story line would be a good break.
OH this is one ofthe good stories.
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