- All
Comments (1) - Add a
Comment - Send
Feedback Send private anonymous feedback to the author (click here to post a public comment instead).
| Literotica Toy Store ADULT TOY & DVD STORE FAST & DISCREET |
Literotica XXX Webcams 24/7 LIVE CAMS - FREE PREVIEW W/AUDIO! |
Literotica Adult Movies STREAMING ADULT MOVIES PAY PER MINUTE |
shameless
I am not a real poet wouldn't know a sonnet if it bit me. the start of this has intrigue first three lines really drew me in as a reader, then the very next line kinda snuffs it out, I should be all excited about lesbian strap on action but for some reason it seems to shift from a great opening line of showing to telling, as if you switch from poetry to prose, the rest of it from there seems to be an interior monologue but it isn't clear what is being thought. this has potential if you can switch up the focus from telling to showing. never an easy task.
thanksfor the read, wish they had a 3.5 option :)
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission! or
Back to Cheating with me or
More submissions by pacifist91w.